Tom

If there's one thing I hate, it's losing. If there's two things I hate, it's losing and getting cancer.

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

When a girl notice you from across the party @colinbird37

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@The_Gooooooose @StoreyLHS Mike Storey saving a true par from the drop zone at the 2020 Okoboji Invitational

[Derek Thompson @DKThomp]

What's the most incredible, statistical-outlier accomplishment in U.S. major sports history?

[Club Pro Guy @ClubProGuy]

All of my #issues with Edna Frank can be traced back to this #moment last fall during Thursday Night Men's League. #TNML #SlowPlay

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

I’ve never met someone who says “bulth” rather than “both” and wasn’t a total asshole

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

“I don’t really have any pet peeves”

*contemplates running over pedestrian walking down the middle of the drive lane in the parking”

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@Sheeva___ I smell Catfish

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@Rojo_Grande Big fan of this take. Would love to see you 13 beers deep, banging the plexiglass

[PGA TOUR @PGATOUR]

To each their own. 💭

There's more than one way to approach the game.

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@becca_hend2 You’re out of control

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@Rojo_Grande @Magic_Max98 Even a petition with 100+ signatures couldn’t make me homecoming king. Probably the main source of my trust issues

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@stoolpresidente If you wanna beat the books today, here’s a layup for ya. Handpicked by my father, professional sports gambler Mike Storey. (Warning) he has not hit a parlay in about 6 years, but he’s due! #BeatTheBooks

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@Rojo_Grande

[Club Pro Guy @ClubProGuy]

Staying #connected with Bryson during these #uncertain times.

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@Rojo_Grande You think you can get rid of me that easily, huh?

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@Rojo_Grande

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@Rojo_Grande me when I beat your ass in cornhole at Beer Olympics

[Barstool Sports @barstoolsports]

Trevor Bauer is FIRED the fuck up https://t.co/ZJsdNiKWta

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@Rojo_Grande When are you gonna grow a pair and go public with your twitter account?

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@The_Gooooooose All I could think of was Mike saying “Go ahead and swing away, Tommy. I’m safe up in the drop zone”

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@Joel_Dahmen @The_Gooooooose @StoreyLHS @Rojo_Grande I don’t think this guy would be able to keep his knees from buckling if @TwitterlessMikeStorey was starring down the barrel at a 20 ft. putt #GOAT

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@The_Gooooooose @DanaB_Number3 “That’s sexual chocolate”

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

“Frank Totta Throws 4 Shutout Innings and Blasts Two Dingers En Route to Opening Day Victory. The man is single-handedly raising the spirits of Americans across the nation.” @KCStar

[Frank Totta @DeepVoiceFrank]

If you wanna watch a slow pitch softball domination I’m at the fields Sunday evenings. #KennyPowers @nate_o_ @Commish_Storey5

[Tom @Commish_Storey5]

@GeorgeHBrett you’re the reason I wore number 5

[Barstool Sports @barstoolsports]

George Brett shits himself twice a year. One of us. @Starting9