TheReturnOfTheKing

I enjoy quiet spaces because I like to be the loudest thing around

[TheReturnOfTheKing @ConnorReedRiver]

I don't bathe, just misbehave.

[TheReturnOfTheKing @ConnorReedRiver]

Alright I’m back and I’m selling exclusively butt fruits and I sell them exclusively to Raccoons. Need islands to visit, hit me up my Animal Crossers.

[TheReturnOfTheKing @ConnorReedRiver]

@MrJakeWelch They holding your camera quality hostage too?

[TheReturnOfTheKing @ConnorReedRiver]

@indusho123 This is me three nights and three mornings of the week.

[BitchyGriff @BitchyGriff]

Merry Christmas try to avoid single use plastics

[TheReturnOfTheKing @ConnorReedRiver]

Oh.. never mind. Just saw a political thread. Gtg 🖖🏼🖕🏽

[TheReturnOfTheKing @ConnorReedRiver]

So I see twitter is now safe again for intellectuals. Like the Messiah, I have returned again to dwell with my people.

[TheReturnOfTheKing @ConnorReedRiver]

@BitchyGriff All hail JS

[TheReturnOfTheKing @ConnorReedRiver]

Legend https://t.co/sKOR49izf2

[BitchyGriff @BitchyGriff]

Puked on my drivers ed teacher https://t.co/SoRnQQUvk4

[TheReturnOfTheKing @ConnorReedRiver]

@BitchyGriff Bet

[jonny sun @jonnysun]

lets all agree to make sure tim burton never sees this https://t.co/Bq8tDRXttV

[elliot @elliothetherton]

[date]

Her: tell me something about yourself

Me: *remembers girls like tough guys* I killed a man

Her: ...

Me: *remembers girls also like sensitive guys* but I cried afterwards

[Garrett Watts @Garrett_Watts]

Last night it was cold & windy & when I opened my door this cricket hopped in, so I set him up good for the night:

- lil’ pot of water
- pickle & Swiss cheese
- left airpod w/ Frank Ocean playing

This morning I let him go & he hopped away happily.

I miss him & hope he’s good

[JayCraig @__jayysmoove]

I thought Highschool naps was good .... COLLEGE naps have you slumped ..

[TheReturnOfTheKing @ConnorReedRiver]

How come Chick-fil-a won't help me cure a hangover on Sunday? Like where they at?

[TheReturnOfTheKing @ConnorReedRiver]

All I want for Christmas is Vine to come back.

[TheReturnOfTheKing @ConnorReedRiver]

Don't give your ID to the police unless they can tell you what crime you're being suspected of and why.

Ask "Am I being detained?" If the answer is yes, MAKE THEM tell you why. When they can't, walk away. If they say no you're free to go.

Also, FILM THE POLICE! They love it! https://t.co/itaiNx35g4