Jordan Crouse

I help build super computers that live in your pants. Go Utes. I am the same me everywhere on the tubes.

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

@mitchellbyars Please accept my condolences. I always appreciated your posts of his adventures.

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

@actioncookbook Holly is the reason I found you way back in the edsbs days. My thoughts are with you. She was one of the goodest.

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

If I don't see you again, be nice to each other. I'm sorry it had to end this way but we'll always have that special Twitter day when Lamar Jackson had to take a dump during the 4th quarter. Elon will never be able to take those memories away. ✌️

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

And so we've come to the end. These are the last tweets (or X or florps or whatever). I have been eyeing an exit strategy for a while but a combination of the rebrand and exodus of people I follow plus the super toxic Utes discourse this week showed me I no longer belong here.

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

I'll still lurk here until the lights go out and everybody finds a new home. I'll be culling my lists and follows so if I drop you it's probably because I found you somewhere else. I use my real name on all the various socials so holla at me if you see me.

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

Branding is my passion

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

So long Utah football. We had our moment in the (Pasadena) sun. It was glorious.

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

So long CU. I'll miss the every other year beatdowns in Boulder.

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

Dude, leave some for the sequel. Damn.

[Patrick Wyman @Patrick_Wyman]

The new Dad Culture podcast, “The Pursuit of Dadliness,” is officially in production. First guest is the fantastic @edsbs, with a talk about the definition of a “hoss,” college football, and Warhammer 40k, followed by @benfowlkesMMA, @nataliapetrzela, and @david_j_roth. Stoked!!!

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

@cronair https://t.co/1m5erzTZfR we are legion.

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

@usujason No lies detected. I'll go the other route if I'm bored or have time but my V60 is my go-to everyday workhorse.

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

Shopped at Target and then watched Barbie. I know you're intimidated. It's natural to have these feelings in the presence of such massive amounts of woke.

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

I've been told my entire career that I need to write less code as I move up but the older I get I write more and more and better and better code. Maybe I won't hit the apex before I retire and/or die but I'm sure going to try.

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

This is incorrect. The more senior you are the more important it is to write code. You owe it to yourself and you owe it to your team. They want to see leaders living their same life, not writing documents and coasting on a few artifacts from a decade ago.

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

The replies. The kids are not alright.

[Kevin Naughton Jr. @KevinNaughtonJr]

99.9% of software engineers can't find the bug in this code

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

Tell me you don't remember the mid 90s without telling me you don't remember the mid 90s.

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

The best part of aging is that we all suffer in our own unique ways. Half way to 48 and I slipped down some slippery ass marble stairs in Athens a month ago and it still hurts to sit. I wouldn't mind a little sleepiness tbqh.

[Jeff Blankenburg @jeffblankenburg]

I’m two days away from 47 years old.

Is it normal to feel sleepy ALL the time?

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

Oh, you came from a small town did you? My hometown was 1,272 in the 1990 census. Get on my level.

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

This is menswearguy's hottest and most correct take.

[derek guy @dieworkwear]

if you're a young person, ask a middle-aged man what music they listened to in the 90s. let them talk for 30 mins. act interested and say "oh wow no way that's so cool." after that you can ask them for any favor

[Jordan Crouse @CosmicPenguin]

It's gonna be a long night for the SDEs on the Prime route generation team. Prayers.

[Beth Bell @elizabethalbell]

You would think the word be out by now to STOP TRYING TO GO UNDER THIS BRIDGE