Courtney Stanley

Nurse • Bartender • Mountaineer • Metalhead

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

Does anyone else wear Salonpas patches to the bar? Asking for a friend

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

@michaelajo10 But I love you & miss you so muchhhh

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

Yeah going out is fun, but have you ever laid in bed and tracked your @Seamless order

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

Would rather watch the Red Wedding over Royal Wedding any day of the week #sorrynotsorry #TeamGOT

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

Sometimes I feel like the bus driver from South Park is my spirit animal & I’m not really that ashamed about it

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

Ever have a random piece of your hair touch you & think it’s a bug & spaz out & then never go back to the coffee shop you were at for fear of being “that spaz girl”.. no?.. same.

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

Can I be @bellathorne or nah?👑

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

Life used to be easy peasy lemon squeezy. Then you become an adult & its hardy hardy pass me the Bacardi

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

Been watching the olympics and have wondered how athletes get into curling. Today I was sweeping the floor and trying to keep the contents away from my cat. I understand now

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

Potential suitor: "what do you love more than anything"
Me: "sleep"
Potential suitor: "no like more than anything in the world"
Me: "I don't understand why you repeated the question..."

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

@ash_n_murray28 But your boo thang lives here now. Think about the "adventures" we would have😈😈😅😅

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

YAS @britneyspears 🔥🔥🔥

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

@vodkamau5 @itsrobmcginnis @ScumbagMonies I'm confused bc I want tagged in the first thing ��not sure what's happening

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

Interviewer:"what is your greatest accomplishment?"
Me: "one time I won 320 pogs in 1995... it included 3 slammers"

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

Stranger: "How single are you?"
Me: "Well my hobbies include ordering a whole pizza for myself & snuggling my cat until she can't breath"

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

@ash_n_murray28 remember when you told me you wanted to live on a planet called Cats & Courtney 😂😂

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

Looking to adopt that kitten from the Ravens game. You the real MVP🐱👍🏻

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

@m_illeee You get a newborn & someone to do your taxes... it's a win/win #GetYouABabyThatCanDoBoth

[Courtney Stanley @CourtneyAllyn2]

Boy are you a U2 album? Bc you keep showing up on my phone when you're unwanted