Cozy Toy Aussie

📬 Dear Cozy / Unlicensed life advice from a Toy Aussie

[Cozy Toy Aussie @CozyToyAussie]

"Dear Cozy, how do I know if a date went well?"

Did they offer food? Rub your head? Let you nap after? That’s a yes.

[Cozy Toy Aussie @CozyToyAussie]

"Dear Cozy, how do I get invited to more things?"

Show up once, be charming, don’t pee on anything. Worked for me.

[Cozy Toy Aussie @CozyToyAussie]

"Dear Cozy, I’m scared of rejection."

I once offered a stick to a goose. Got hissed at. Offered it again.

[Cozy Toy Aussie @CozyToyAussie]

"Dear Cozy, my therapist canceled again."

Chase your tail for 10 minutes. Same results, no copay.

[Cozy Toy Aussie @CozyToyAussie]

"Dear Cozy, I just got laid off. What now?"

Dig a hole. Yell into it. Then dig another. Repeat until peace.

[Cozy Toy Aussie @CozyToyAussie]

"Dear Cozy, how do I make friends as an adult?"

Bring snacks. That’s how I built a 12-dog alliance at the park.

[Cozy Toy Aussie @CozyToyAussie]

"Dear Cozy, I think my dog likes my roommate more than me."

Sleep on their pillow. Assert dominance.

[Cozy Toy Aussie @CozyToyAussie]

"Dear Cozy, how do I handle being ghosted?"
Pee on something they love. Move on.