Crab

Deep sea scavenger. Omnivorous chancer. Sideways is the only way.

[Crab @CrabActually]

This is embarrassing

[New York Post @nypost]

Emails reveal new theory about who Jeffrey Epstein was really working for https://t.co/mFwIOSKCN0

[Crab @CrabActually]

@thelefttake Yes purely because they ordered PG Tips

[Crab @CrabActually]

PG fucking Tips!?!?! He would wouldn’t he. If PG Tips was a person it’d be Keir Starmer.

[Politics UK @PolitlcsUK]

🚨 PICTURED: Keir Starmer's food shop from Ocado arrives at No 10

[Crab @CrabActually]

Don’t smoke crack kids

[Paul Mason @paulmasonnews]

It's very simple - the GPEW has been subject to an entry tactic by pro-Putin and pro-Hamas Stalinists and Zack has bought the full prospectus - sad really 😢

[Crab @CrabActually]

@israelophobix Wait you’re supposed to salute them? Maybe that’s why there’s so much sorrow in my life.

[Crab @CrabActually]

Funny thing I’ve barely seen anyone comment on relating to this is now we know without a shadow of a doubt that Trump had Epstein killed.

[Crab @CrabActually]

@justuseanything @ceekayem0 @hanleyPa @07bobbin Austerity you moron

[Goth Chris @Goth__Chris]

Kelly Osbourne stuns in new pictures ✨

[He dives to the left @RFC5572_]

She’s got her auld mans hands in his will

[Crab @CrabActually]

@PotatoMcWhiskey That’s literally what happened

[BEAST MODE 🇨🇩🇲🇿🇰🇵 @BEASTMO90001125]

“Describe the west with a single image”

[Crab @CrabActually]

@israelophobix Kebab shop owners. Not only stupid but bloody foreign as well WAAAAAAGGGHH

[Crab @CrabActually]

Lovely thread full of stupid cunts replying to this perfectly fine and true statement

[danny @d4nnytye]

so much of britain’s horrible political culture hinges on the belief that state pension isn’t a benefit because people “paid in”

[Crab @CrabActually]

It’s quite clear she’s getting a cut of whatever the Disney fake rocker prick is making and that’s where the whole Ozzy Heir thing came from. Wringing cash out of her dying husband till the end of his days and beyond.

I hope she’s really mean and makes him do humiliating stuff.

[Pop Base @PopBase]

Sharon Osbourne and Yungblud arrive to the #Grammys red carpet.

[Crab @CrabActually]

Michael wants @ZohranKMamdani to invent tiny snow ploughs to save people the 20 minutes max it would take to dig around their cars they clearly don’t urgently need to use. He also doesn’t understand how salt works. Maybe they could tweet for Israel and hire someone with the $$$

[MichaelRapaport @MichaelRapaport]

A week after the snowstorm and this is what we got Zoron the Shoveler!
Filthy black snow, garbage soup, ice rinks on every corner, cars buried like fossils.
People slipping, breaking ankles, nobody shoveling, nobody salting, nobody doing SH*T.
This is New York City.
Three minutes from the mayor’s house.
Start spreading the news… this place is a dirty snow covered dump.

Clean it the f*** up Mayor

[Crab @CrabActually]

@MetroUK No. Obviously not.

[Crab @CrabActually]

lol the QAA guys getting that Barry Bump

[Devin 🌱 Thomas O'Shea @devintoshea]

new @QAApod just dropped

[Crab @CrabActually]

@Whenpigfly75731 Maybe you should fix it by all going away forever

[Crab @CrabActually]

Nobody cares how Americans feel when they’re called yank. It isn’t about making you feel hurt, it’s about demonstrating our disgust for you and your shit hole county and culture. Everyone hates the yanks and we love saying it.

[lú @vatesvates]

im not completely certain but i dont think calling an american person a yank is the scathing pejorative that many people in the uk seem to think it is

[Crab @CrabActually]

@MDualsense @chrisTravisReal @ExtremeBlitz__ You fucking loser lol

[Crab @CrabActually]

@Pamela_Vista 😂

[Crab @CrabActually]

I’m sure I’m disliked in various twitter circles and I’m absolutely fine with it but there’s one guy who replies to nearly everyone I like on here and he’s a bellend. Just saying.