Critical Poet

#Critter | #Writer of poems about @CriticalRole, #Geeklife & real life. (He/Him) | Body Positivity | #FitGeek #HealthyGeek | #BLM #Atheist

[Critical Poet @CriticalPoet]

Please share! Here is what has turned into Chapter 1 of my #poem/#story #WritingCommunity #Writing #Fantasy inspired by #DnD #TTRPG. I hope you #Critters enjoy it!

[Critical Poet @CriticalPoet]

Church billboard around the corner from me: “Kneeling will keep you in good standing”. Classic. 😂

[Nashville Zoo @NashvilleZoo]

Stand with us to protect the future of Nashville Zoo.

A proposed 69,000-square-foot data center is planned next to the Zoo, but no environmental impact studies have been conducted. Sign our petition to help protect the animals in our care ➡️ https://t.co/q2ISQnxLBK

[Critical Poet @CriticalPoet]

Remember when we grew up playing Final Fantasy 7 and they blew up the mako reactor to help save the planet from dying, but it was a moral/ethical dilemma due to the harm it caused? Imagine if they did that but with zero downside!

Anyway, those AI data centers…

[Bennie🕊️ @Bennieeexyz]

A customer at the library asked me a question I wasn't prepared for.

Customer: Excuse me.

Customer: Why does this machine require flesh?

Me: ...what?

Customer: This machine.

Customer: I am touching it, but it does not work.

Customer: Is because... flesh?

At this point I was trying very hard to figure out whether I had accidentally wandered into a horror movie.

Then she held up her hands.

She was wearing gloves.

Me: Oh!

Me: The touchscreen.

Me: Right.

Me: Yeah, it probably can't detect your fingers through the gloves.

Customer: Ah.

Customer: Okay.

Customer: Sorry to bother.

Me: No, no.

Me: That's the best thing I've heard all week.

She laughed.

The machine worked.

And I thought that was the end of it.

It was not.

Now whenever one of our library computers stops working, someone inevitably says:

Staff: It requires flesh.

Staff: The machine must be fed.

Another staff member: Who's volunteering?

So thanks to one perfectly innocent question, our library now sounds like a cult every time the self-checkout freezes.

[Critical Poet @CriticalPoet]

@DeeGeeGames2009 Return Fire

[Critical Poet @CriticalPoet]

The Oneders, who were set to have their comeback reunion, have backed out of the Freedom 250 concert.

[Really American 🇺🇸 @ReallyAmerican1]

Steve Harness: “When is a reporter gonna snap back and say don’t you fucking talk to me that way? I’m a goddamned adult. I’m here working. You work for us, asshole. Go fuck yourself. Somebody, for the love of God, I will buy the Pulitzer for you if you will just tell this man how fucking dare you, do not talk to me that way”

[Critical Poet @CriticalPoet]

@rblxforsaken

[Critical Poet @CriticalPoet]

@rblxforsaken

[Brad @BraddrofliT]

The craziest part?
The wealthy stayed wealthy.
The middle class didn’t get hit.
The sky didn’t fall.

Almost like the panic was always propaganda.

[Fergenstein @BiigRED_95]

How do you read things like this and not want them GONE

[April Ajoy @aprilajoyr]

How am I supposed to make satire when headlines like this are real 😭

[Critical Poet @CriticalPoet]

@rblxforsaken A Plants vs Zombies take by my son!

[Critical Poet @CriticalPoet]

@rblxforsaken Scarecrow AZURE! Based on an everyday real life scarecrow :) (from my 11 year old!)

[Critical Poet @CriticalPoet]

Join me! https://t.co/578YHsZ8zv

[Critical Poet @CriticalPoet]

I kept seeing people with houses in Crimson Desert and kept wondering when I would get mine. Apparently I got it a LONG ASS time ago and just somehow didn’t realize it. 🤷🏻‍♂️🤷🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️ #CrimsonDesert

[Critical Poet @CriticalPoet]

Excited to be the 4,265th 😎 on @BackerKit for RiffTrax Makes MST3K! — Four NEW episodes in 2026!. Thanks @rifftrax https://t.co/wUI9Z8WjEZ

[Critical Poet @CriticalPoet]

Try it out! https://t.co/578YHsZ8zv

[Critical Poet @CriticalPoet]

Anyone??