Donna Liberty

cackles like a skeleton

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

Ladies Who Lunch on Each Other's Scrunch, a.k.a. The Red Twat Society.

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

As featured in Working Woman, Lady Business, and Corporate Vagina magazine.

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

So we're supposed to believe Sam Niell can protect two children from an island of DINOSAURS when he can't even save a baby from a dingo??

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

I'm the kind of person that would've brought napkins and solo cups to the Donner Party.

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

I make a lot of noise during sex, and it seems to be a big turn-off? But hey, I get it: not everyone's into slap bass.

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

$3.50 for an empanada? What is this, 2017?

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

Why was the vanilla yogurt brown? Because I ate it.

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

Q: Was the Fonz gay or straight? A: He was ayyyyyy-sexual!

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

Overcook a steak? Plate it with a pink ribbon and a pair of googly eyes, and when they ask "WTF?" tell them it's a "Ms Steak!" LOOOOOL.

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

"Oh yeah? Well I'm gonna mess you up! Rearrange your FACE." -- Pablo Picasso

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

Q: What's big, wet, and smells like stale urine? A: A big ol' dog who needs a bath, that's who!

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

If robotic boner lasts for more than 6 hours, activate auto-destruct sequence. #TheFuture

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

9/11 was an inside job! #AprilFools

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't take you pants off in public. #LessonLearned

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

RoboCock #RoboCop

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

Fart? Orgasm? It's a thin blue line. #RoboCop

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

RobOOOOOOOOcop #RoboCop

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

Hate it when you finally find time for that little project, but when you go into the tool shed to get started the hitchhiker is already dead

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

Oh stop, Donatello! ::blushes:: #TeenageMutantNinjaFLIRTLE

[Donna Liberty @CroutonShield]

@MelissaMednicov Depends on what I ate. Lamb vindaloo? "The Old Guitarist." Vegetarian chili? "Three Musicians."