Crusty Buster

i am going to kill myself

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

@DenimBong @grok @grok I’m going to actually destroy you with improvised explosives and sheer willpower

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

“raped” by the system yet again

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

Infinite blowjobs suckling me to extinction powered by the sacred fuel of mental illness

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

I’ve ended your life a thousand times in my dreams but I am a merciful deity no matter how sleepy

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

@Claralkpz neither, apparently

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

Got a new job cleaning up Clifford the big red dog’s 400lb shit logs

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

referring to myself as “the Raped Ape of the West” in work emails

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

jerkin on her clintoris

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

pissing on all of the toilet paper in the disabled stall. double whammy

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

gang don’t know I fw spiders big time

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

I’m like Ted Lasso but if his coping mechanisms were unhealthy and he wanted to die

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

@nobleisawinner I grew massive masculine breasts

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

frantically throwing a wad of $1 bills at the Five Guys cashier before grabbing an armful of peanuts and scrambling out the door with my pants around my ankles

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

I’m like Michael Jordan if he was stupid as fuck and fat and white

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

Literally munching a fart sandwich

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

@DenimBong Michael b Jackson off his weiner

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

reveal to me your absolute genitals

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

@DenimBong the beauty of humanity is that instinctually I do both to survive

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

an oversized bumper sticker that says “I had my butt fucked in the double holocaust. Don’t ask”

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

@DenimBong good theories

[Crusty Buster @Crusty_Buster]

perfecting my “theories” using stray animals