Crutchie Morris

I don't need folks. I got friends. Parody/fan account

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

How to kindly tell somebody that if they don't shut up they's gonna get a black eye #askingforafriend #andbyfriendimeanjack #hessingingagain

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

Are youse telling me I'm out ANOTHER job? Who'd a thunk this newsie gig would be so hard to keep?

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

I love you more than Jack loves Santa Fe.

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

WHO TOLD ROMEO THAT PIGEONS EAT PEOPLE??? HE'S HIDING UNDER HIS BED AN HE AINT COMING OUT.

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

Update: Les just snuck back inside cause he was cold.

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

There is so much snow, we lost Les. He was there one minute, gone the next. I think he got swallowed up by the snow.

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

*titanic theme plays sadly in the background*

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

WHY WOULD ANYBODY DO THIS???????

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

What's the Super Bowl?

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

NOOOOOBODY KNOOOOWS THE TROUBLE IVE SEEEE-- oh hey Jack, how long have you been standing over there I was just... ah... practicing...

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

Okay all of youse, help me pick. The happiness of a ragtag gang of poor, strangely attractive newsboys is at stake.

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

I'se been tryin to figure out what to get the boys for Christmas, and I think I finally got it.

Matching Christmas vests.

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

@craycrayunicorn I'll be 16 in January! At least, I think it's sometime in January...

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

Christmas list:
Revive Newsies
New crutch
A bagel
Revive Newsies
Revive Newsies

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

Alright, I ain't gonna lie, I walked all the way to Brooklyn for Starbucks. But CURDLED COFFEE? REALLY??? CAN YA BLAME ME?????????????

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

Pro tip: Black Friday does NOT apply to papes. I repeat it does NOT APPLY TO PAPES.

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

Pulitzer and Hearst they think they got us, do they got us?

NO
WELL MAYBE I AM NOT SURE EXACTLY HOW THIS WORKS

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

Finally, a way to settle this! Who da ya think is cuter, me or Les?

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

Les ran into the lodging house this morning singing Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer 😑 #itaintchristmasyet

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

When fanfic writers always kill you off #justcrutchiethings

[Crutchie Morris @CrutchieMorris]

I'll run a marathon before Jack stops whining about Santa Fe.