Christine Turek

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

@thisisstolen cool truck. Saw it this morning on I-295 and it def got me thinking.

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

@FedExHelp care to explain why my package hasn’t moved for 21 days?

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

@Snapchat how come you don’t allow active duty military to suspend their snapstreaks for deployment?

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

Is it just me or did #HighSchoolMusical leave an entire generation with #unrealistic #expectations of how many impromptu choreographed song and dance numbers they would be a part of? #millenials #millenialproblems @Disney @ZacEfron @VanessaHudgens @ashleytisdale @MrGrabeel

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

@xoBetseyJohnson I absolutely love your lines! I wanted to buy these, but they don’t come in size 12 :( I’m 5’10” and have big feet and can never find shoes that go with my outgoing personality.

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

Just got back to my apartment and there’s a dead cockroach in my shower. Its about the size of a quarter. Always keeping in classy @CPM_APTS #bugs #cockroach #thanksguys

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

@portilloshotdog what’s with the false advertising? Telling your loyal Chicago area customers that you aren’t honoring the 2 for $5 hotdog deal? In your hometown? I’m extremely disappointed. #angrycustomers #falseadvertising #NationalHotDogDay #explainyourself

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

@PlanetFitness This should also be available for college students!

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

My boyfriend told me he was going to the bathroom. I said “have fun. I never know what to say to people who say that”. He said “I’ll be thinking about you. I never know what to say to people who I tell that I’m going to the bathroom” #whatislove #quotes #funny #boyfriend #jokes

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

Dad, did you get a haircut? No I got them all cut. #blockidadjokes

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

Girls steal their boyfriends’ clothes for two reasons:
1. They smell like them and 2. They like to see their boyfriends naked. #Girlfriends #boyfriends #myhoodienow #smellsgood #cuddles #missyou #loveyou #seeyousoon

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

Let’s just all take a minute to remember the day I said to a teen girl “hi! Did you enjoy your salon service? You look fantastic! What did we do for you today?” before reading her ticket and realizing she got a bikini wax. Ahh memories. #Salon #retailproblems #cashierprobs #wax

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

I don’t always tweet, but when I do it’s because my whole world is falling apart. #struggle #help

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

#Illini took over #Athens! #architecture @ARCHatIllinois @MaddySpeicher @elise_skulte #ILL

[Jamar CHUM1045 Toronto @JamarJNiice]

[Listen] Showbiz Smackdown: @Cturek2 From Lyons https://t.co/IU45lOrrFW

[James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn @XplodingUnicorn]

7-year-old: Knock knock.

Me: Who's there?

7: Probably someone you don't want to talk to.

Too real.

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

@TheGoodGodAbove #BeingraisedCatholic screws you up. 12 year old virgin with a late period and thinking "Well shit. I'm another Virgin Mary"

[Christine Turek @Cturek2]

@TheGoodGodAbove anything good happening in the world? We all need a little bit of goodness. #SilverLining