Mellie 🦢

blk, 5’3 relapsing 🖤

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

I love that everything I own is too big on me but at the same time I hate not having anything to wear :(

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

I wish there was a NA for ED recovery. I would kill to vent to a group of people that understand and give actual useful advice 😵‍💫

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

@bambissevl It is for me but when I hit a certain point, like when I’m having binge thoughts but feel the pain it gives me a rush that lowkey suppresses my appetite.

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

@nskrcal Heyy

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

@aposikenedos Heyy

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

@aposikenedos

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

I hate that no ones able to see my replies if I’m private. Like how are ppl gonna follow me if they don’t know i interact with them.

[Cupcake enjoyer @cupcak3vampir3]

pose I be hitting in class when im hungry but staying locked in #edtwt #ana

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

@aposikenedos Dropping a subtle body check on the main 🧘🏽‍♀️

[ella ✿ relapsing @starvedgemini]

it really does get easier to eat less the more you do it in my opinion

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

Literally me.

[june 🦢 @cranberrysprtz]

waking up every morning to find i’ve hit a new lw

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

@ierolbs I got caught by a irl once & it became a very big deal. I haven’t felt safe since.

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

On the bright side at least I’ve already hit 5 of my Gw’s 🧘🏽‍♀️

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

Yeah remind me to never tell my therapist anything ED related ever again.

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

Relapsing bad. -45lbs will do that ig 🧘🏽‍♀️

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

Like I get somatic memories sometimes of the feeling of my fingers in the back of my throat and a sick part of me gets a rush from it. It’s genuinely so addictive like I can genuinely ignore the urges but oh my god it would feel like such a release

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

It’s been a year and 4 months since I last purged. Im really taking this recovery thing seriously. But lord with everything going on in the world rn the only thing my nervous system wants to do to feel some control is relapse.

[Mellie 🦢 @Cursedmellie]

And the urges are so much more tempting bc somehow I’ve managed to accidentally lose 34lbs. Honestly just venting but yeah I’m sick.

[hien ୨ৎ @yangwoncal]

never tell irls abt your ed

[bea ♡ @stowopid]

"you're so funny"

thanks! i weigh myself first thing every morning after i pee, no clothes, no apple watch, and before a single drop of water touches my body