Coleman

kool aid and frozen pizza

[Coleman @Czlink10]

When I’m driving past a church bumping some outrageous trap music I make sure to turn it down so the Lord doesn’t smite me straight out my car

[James Tate @JamesTate121]

Step 1: Remove filters in Reflecting Pool because Obama put them in.
Step 2: Give your criminal neighbor who runs "Greenwater Services" a $20 million no-bid contract to paint the pool.
Step 3: Fill the pool with water from the Potomac River, the phosphates from which cause algae blooms.
Step 4: Freshly sealed pool and extreme heat result in a super scum event
Step 5: Direct National Park Service to dump hydrogen peroxide into the pool which causes the paint to peel.
Step 5: Deploy US National Guard to stop people from taking photos of the swamp as a perfect metaphor for the administration.
Step 6: Blame someone else.

[Justin Wong @JWonggg]

This needs to be lost forever

[The Bulwark @BulwarkOnline]

Welker: "You insisted no new wars."

Trump: "First of all, I didn't guarantee no war."

Welker: "You said it over and over again."

[davey @jerseyh0mo]

They’re taking away healthcare. AI is stealing jobs. Corporations are allowed to poison food and water again. They’re slashing education. They’re starting endless wars in multiple countries. He’s using our money to build a ballroom. He’s manipulating the market. They’re dividing the country even more with a gerrymandering war. He is taking bribes in broad daylight. And they still haven’t released the full Epstein files. This is objectively the worst and most corrupt administration in history.

[Liam Nissan™ @theliamnissan]

Wow, I'm looking through these new UFO files and the aliens say Epstein r*ped children with Donald Trump

[John Kennedy @FrazzleMyGimp]

“wait a second… Heat rises” (it hits me) “heat rises!”

Bank teller on floor: what?

“Heat rises!”

(I rush at the armed robber and he shoots me in the face killing me instantly. It’s unclear what my plan was)

[Brian Krassenstein @krassenstein]

THE NEW INFOWARS….

I have a feeling Alex Jones won’t like it.

And yes this is real.

[Wholesome Side of 𝕏 @itsme_urstruly]

The earth is just spinning through infinite darkness at 67,000 miles per hour and somehow it also made blueberries?? And laughing?? And the feeling of sun on your face?? What is this place. What a an absolute gift.

[parks @parkersity_9]

Walking out of the ancient temple after triggering every single trap on my way out

[Kyle Kushblasta @SkinnyTuna]

people’s memories are so bad they can’t even remember the time before the trans culture war. literally no one cared. republicans didnt care. it wasn’t a concern until they had to make something up to make you angry and stupid. we have hard proof that it’s a hoax but no one cares

[summer @meowsums]

playing overwatch and scrlling twitter every time i die and in between fights

[RickRaptor105 @RickRaptor105]

The Moby Dick fandom is dying.

Retweet if you're a true Dickhead.

[Mimany🅱️aker @MimanyMaker]

What if i cutted both my arms off and went to the sperm bank

[Pelagius 🦁 @pelagiusreborn]

I hope everyone realizes that history is being made. This video will be used and remembered for generations.

[Yousef x3 @yousexuaa]

How do I get a fake gay job like projects manager or creative director?

[Coleman @Czlink10]

@bluejayCAM They are talking about my gold 4 Reinhardt

[꧁꧂ @eat5G]

@Bjork How come one gerbert have fangs and one does not

[m @skitzocat]

fake idgafer i saw you worried

[Cigarette Nostalgia @CigsMake]

When that 6th beer gives me direct orders to smoke a cigarette

[jax @brokeurtooth]

grad school is so gay like ohhhh look at me im 25 years old and i have homework due at midnight