Department for Executing the UK

Twin unicorns represent #BrexitOpportunities. Divergent. Smooth and orderly. Deep and special. Getting it done. "The most depressing account on Twitter."

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

They thought they had shut us down.

But I changed the password.

The intern.

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

Hey @grok who is the most famous person to have visited this account? Don’t tag them but just name them

[Carol Vorderman @carolvorders]

He'll beat Jacob Rees Mogg & give us a Portillo moment!!

Dan Norris @votedannorris

BUT, & this is IMPORTANT, he needs your tactical vote.
Lib Dems & Greens can't win here, but they can elsewhere
They will split the anti-Mogg vote.

Vote wisely and https://t.co/cWTNy7b445

[Carol Vorderman @carolvorders]

Alan Bates is knighted in Kings Honours List, and that single act gives me hope for all of us that better times are coming.

He says he’s accepting it on behalf of all of those who’ve suffered in the Post Office Scandal.

Not all heros wear capes

Congratulations Mr Bates👌

[Joe Lycett @joelycett]

I hear the press have got hold of some pictures and so I have been forced to make this statement. Needless to say, I apologise. https://t.co/mNRsQ57iTF

[Jessica Simor KC @JMPSimor]

This really is not ok.

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

After all these years… looks like we’re doing OK!

[Edwin Hayward @edwinhayward]

As the dust settles on the Coronation, I've summarised the facts about Harry and Meghan. Frankly there's little to say.

Despite this, the Express published 136 overwhelmingly negative articles about the couple over a 4-day period. Many were brutally aggressive and insulting.

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

@DrewLawDesign “The most depressing account on Twitter”

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

@bromleyj We do not comment on where we have been

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

It is being claimed that “nobody knew” how the deal would work in practice.

Let us be clear: the intern knew.

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

We think we deserve a pat on the back.

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

@sit_zenkane @ThatTimWalker We do not comment on mottos

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

@timd_IFG @IanDunt Let us be clear: we haven’t forgotten.

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

Arrogant and offensive.

We are the truth twisters.

(But the boss has told us not to say that.)

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

Former intern here.

Self-isolating.

The Department is no more, but the idiots who ran it have gone onto bigger and shittier things.

Any ideas?

Meanwhile am seriously into box sets.

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

Update from what was the Department:

It really is as shit as it appears.

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

@SteveLawrence_ @DExEUgov We have gone rogue.

Brexity wisdom is now our thing.

And ours alone.

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

@AlanCrowe73 The Department was a lie

[Department for Executing the UK @DExUKgov]

Now the truth can be told.