DasCrazyJessy

Crazy cat lady, who just wants to be nice to everyone. Love everything, hates negativity, very socially awkward, nutshell of my life!

[NO CONTEXT HUMANS @HumansNoContext]

Japanese duo makes unbelievable sounds with their bodies

[𝕮 @XCzsnx]

The bakery called me at 9:12 in the morning and asked if I still wanted the words hot pink.

Me: What words?

Bakery Lady: Congrats On Your Divorce.

Me: (long pause) I think you have the wrong person.

Bakery Lady: This number is on the order.

Me: I'm not divorced.

Bakery Lady: Then somebody in your family is being very optimistic.

Turns out my younger brother had ordered himself a divorce cake and used my number because he "didn't want weird calls at work."

I called him immediately.

Me: Did you order a divorce cake?

Brother: Technically.

Me: There are no technicalities with cake, Kevin.

Brother: It was supposed to be funny.

Me: It says Congrats On Your Divorce in hot pink.

Brother: Yeah.

Me: That's not funny. That's a cry for help with frosting.

He'd been separated for four months and acting weirdly cheerful about it, which in my family is always suspicious.

Brother: My friends are coming over tonight. We were gonna do a whole reset party.

Me: A reset party.

Brother: New chapter. Bad tequila. Cake. You know.

Me: I don't know. That's why I'm calling.

Then he got quiet.

Brother: She signed the papers this morning.

Me: Oh.

Brother: So now it feels less funny.

Me: You want me to cancel the cake?

Brother: Can you change it?

Me: To what?

Brother: I don't know. Something less... gloating.

I called the bakery back.

Me: Can you fix the cake?

Bakery Lady: Depends. Are we reducing the pink or reducing the divorce?

Me: Both if possible.

She laughed way too hard at that.

By that night the cake said Welcome Back, Kevin.

No divorce. No ex-wife shade. Just his name in blue.

His friends still came over.

One of them brought paper plates and one brought a six-pack and one just walked in and hugged him for a weirdly long time.

Brother: This is so much better.

Me: I know.

Brother: The pink would've been too much.

Me: The pink was insane.

Then his friend Ryan opened the box and read it.

Ryan: Welcome back to what?

Brother: Honestly? Me, hopefully.

That was the first honest thing he'd said all day.

We still ate the whole cake.

[Wholesome Side of 𝕏 @itsme_urstruly]

The owner put a little flower on his turtle to prevent it from getting lost. 😂

[Raportory @raportory]

Bir fotoğrafçı, sokak kedilerinin fotoğraflarını çekip ortaya çıkan sonucu paylaştı:

[🤠 @heavensbvnny]

THIS IS IMPORTANT!!

[Sarrah Bellus @sarrah_bellus]

The red cards work!

[NO CONTEXT HUMANS @HumansNoContext]

This is hilarious

[Restoring Your Faith in Humanity @HumanityChad]

The moment when the British granddaughter introduced grandfather to American grilled cheese.

[Marie Isabella @MarieIsabellaB]

I don’t even need the blanket😆

[Meidas_Charise Lee @charise_lee]

Love this

[Boys Being Boys @boysbelnboys]

Reliving his childhood

[90s WWE @90sWWE]

🤣🤣🤣

[‏ً @omgsidewalks]

Teenagers have started calling AI art “boomer art” and consider it cringe, and YouTubers have stopped using AI-generated thumbnails because teenagers find them cringe and won't click on them. And honestly, I couldn't be happier.