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Sarcasm is just punching people in the face with words.

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Spirit Animal

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@cutedeyforyou Enjoying weed is life.

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The NCAA football coaches are the highest paid in like 40 states or whatever because they are busy constantly reminding the athletes that they are in fact students. They spend the most time with "the students" so it only makes sense.

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The music mashup youtube rabbit hole adventures are usually worth it..

https://t.co/acare12vM4

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Song is still relevant

[1 AMVRKA @1AMVRKA]

Our debut EP, One America is available today. Check it out and share!
@Spotify: https://t.co/QXL4pQ8CFj

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@_marplesyrup A set of bibbies and a little bit of confidence.

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This dude keeps dropping the price so we just gonna wait a extra minute for the next discount.

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@wokesnark I'm learning about important dates in history, wanna be one of them?

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@thehill Federal Court is the real threat to society.

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Groundhogs Day spin-off but like the worst version.

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@davehclark @amazonnews Stfu dweeb

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@therecount I've honestly never seen a "made in _____" label on any Desoxyn, Adderall or Ritalin prescription but it sounds like he's saying there's job opportunities to be had in Montana.

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Have we tried dumping all the bottled water out into the canal to raise the water level?

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@brooklynmarie February '95 based on the calendar on the shelf. And John Fox radio blog from '99 has you emailing in about the clear channel merger while back packing around the world.

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@KayOstas @FrancescaDiasio @boulderpolice Police scanner said 6 + an officer but that was from SWAT/Task force inside and from the guy who live streamed it right after the start, you can see 2 in the parking lot. Later, on the scanner, SWAT requests a medic for a victim who "it was pretty apparent" was DOA. So 6 to 9.

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At one point, SWAT called for explosives to breach a door they couldn't open w/hand tools. Audibly exhausted from trying for however long. You hear the explosive tech "Ready. Describe the door." (He's primed for this)
Then "The manager has the key, guys." And a sadness was felt.

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@SomehowSamantha @CBSNews Colorado

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Big yikes

[NRA @NRA]

ICYMI: A Colorado judge gave law-abiding gun owners something to celebrate.

In an @NRAILA-supported case, he ruled that the city of Boulder’s ban on commonly-owned rifles (AR-15s) and 10+ round mags was preempted by state law and STRUCK THEM DOWN. https://t.co/wmdhGG16pc

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Housing in Denver be like:
2bd 2ba 1400 Sq ft. .28 of an acre
Built in 1977 2 car attached garage
Needs upgrades. $50 HOA fee
Listed for $495,000

fuck

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I added some new flavor to my workout playlist - @atribecalledred @Supamanhiphop @nation_halluci - and tbh, that shit bumbs. Indigenous artists and the message in their lyrics/videos is heavily slept on.

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@LAPDHQ Sounds like something a guilty person would say. Some serious "Not all men" energy. Grow up. Buy a mirror.