When she was 18 years old, Daisy Strongin underwent a gender transition because she thought she wanted to become a man. 4 years later, she regrets it—and faces the irreversible impacts of that choice.
https://t.co/Y9b4Al5mH9
Just as I was starting to get my energy back, I threw my back out. 8/10 pain last night just trying to walk. I’ve always had a bad back but I’ve Never experienced anything like this before.
Im feeling better today. Looking at my breasts again they do look pretty good for only being 5 days post-op. Over the next weeks and months the muscles will relax and gradually they will drop and look more bottom-heavy rather than two skin-tight domes. The physical feeling is not painful, but rather very unsettling. I feel like it’s dangerous to take a deep breath or stand up straight. Any more talk about how my new breasts visually look from this point on may not be very prudent… I plan on making a YouTube video about my experience once I’m healed and used to them so I can help other detransitioners who may be considering this procedure. There’s very little information online about it.
Well, that didn’t go as I expected. There were no tears of joy with this reveal.
Looking down at them, they look good. But I just saw them full frontal for the first time and… they look weird. I know that is to be expected only 4 days post-op, and that with time they will drop and have more a natural slope. My doctor seemed pleased and reassured me that they won’t look like this permanently. But right now they look like two half bowling balls on my chest. It also physically feels very scary and strange to have these two foreign objects shoved in my chest. Unfortunately instead of relief, I felt another wave of regret. This is the reality of trying to detransition. It’s like trying to put back together an egg that’s already been cracked open. Like I’m trying to pick up the white and yolks desperately trying to get it all back in and taping it back shut. Why oh why did I do this to myself. I miss my natural breasts so so much!!!
Horizontal. I already had scars from my top surgery so the just put the incision over the scar so as to not create a new one. I wish I had inquired about fat grafting, but I don’t think I would have qualified… and if I got pregnant again in the future I think it would’ve made the skin stretching more painful.
@EllePalmer1 Personally I do feel like reconstruction is significantly healing for me and I do feel like I’ve fixed the problem of my chest in a very real way but I see what you’re saying and I appreciate your kind words ❤️
I can’t wait to get these bandages off. The binding on them reminds me of my early trans days. But at the same time, the feeling of having breasts again is so beautifully familiar. I’m so happy. Not the sort of ecstatic delusion-based euphoria that I felt after “top surgery”. I feel whole again. I feel like myself again.
The only thing left that is stuck in the past is my voice… VFS is scary, but tempting. This is the voice that my children know as their mothers voice. It is the voice my husband fell in love with. But it’s the only thing holding me back from feeling like I have fully, successfully detransitioned.
My kids are 2 and 4 so I can’t speak on what it’s like to parents children beyond that age but it is really hard to imagine anything being more difficult than the newborn stage. So far it’s only gotten easier as they age. I’m actually really looking forward to ages 5-10.