Hajime Miura just clinched his 8th 3A World Yo-Yo Championship title at the World Yo-Yo Contest 2025 in Prague—cementing his legacy as one of the most dominant players ever.
Making a video about this soon but: the reason why avoidantly attached people sometimes seem super-secure when you first met them is bc avoidance unconsciously performs what it believes to be the 'right' thing at all times, whereas secure attachment doesn't & is more honest from the get-go.
Guy who has a job he loves, a significant other, plentiful savings, contributes to his retirement fund, lives in walkable city, hangs out with his friends on the weekends, keeps in touch with his loving family, travels internationally 1-2 times a year, and exercises regularly
Pathological demand avoidance is personality functioning related to compliance being prioritized over love and safety during critical developmental periods in childhood and early adulthood. It is common for people growing up with autism, but is not a symptom of autism itself.
In Book II, Chapter 2 of “The Brothers Karamazov”, Father Zossima cutting to the core of Fyodor Karamazov’s buffoonery and lies, I would argue is empathic in that he knows the mind of the Fyodor and how the Fyodor’s mind has gotten off course (highly recommend reading the whole chapter):
Above all, do not lie to yourself. The one who lies to himself and listens to his own lie reaches such a point that he can no longer distinguish any truth either within himself or around him, and thus falls into disrespect both for himself and for others. Respecting no one, he ceases to love, and to occupy himself and distract himself without love, he surrenders to passions and coarse pleasures, descending completely to bestiality in his vices—all from incessant lying to people and to himself. The one who lies to himself can be offended before anyone else. After all, being offended is sometimes very pleasant, isn't it? And a person knows that no one has offended him, but that he has invented the offense for himself and lied for embellishment, exaggerated himself to create a picture, latched onto a word and made a mountain out of a pea—he knows this himself, yet he is the first to take offense, takes offense to the point of pleasure, to the sensation of great enjoyment, and thereby reaches true enmity...
But do stand up, sit down, I beg you earnestly, for all this too is false gestures...
I’m with Carveth (and Symington) on the need to rescue the conscience/morality in psychoanalysis, and differentiating the conscience from the superego. Good stuff
https://t.co/EoHfH15sdw
More on good therapy - taken from the files in my own soul:
My good therapists were serious, yet warm. They made eye contact constantly - even if I couldn’t. Our dialogues felt natural yet they were listening differently than my friend at the coffee shop. 1/