Danielle Laura

🤙🏼

[#Randy @RandyResist]

I don’t think people realize how wealthy people live. Yacht owners have staff on call, including a chef, just to be available when they feel like getting on their toy boat. A Walmart grandkid has a $300M boat docked at an island and when she decides to take the boat out, nearly all the fuel available on the island is used to fill it. Our fiscal problems are not due to 54 year old people on food stamps not working, our debt is due to too many billionaires not paying their fair share.

[Fifty Shades of Whey @davenewworld_2]

2 drivers in Florida started firing their guns at each other in a fit of road rage for no reason. One man had a 5-year-old in his car and the other one had a 14-year-old. Both of the children got shot. Just like our forefathers intended when they wrote the Constitution.

[grace 🤝 @debtbarbie]

it’s so funny to see tweets like this bc…they DO know their audience…they’re a multi million dollar company. YOU losers are the minority here!!! everyone hates you bigots and you only think you’re the majority because you’re all so fucking loud and annoying about your baseless hatred.

[New York Yankees @Yankees]

Born to be a Yankee.

[Andrea Russett @AndreaRussett]

last month i called 911 on myself for feeling suicidal and the bill with insurance is over $2,000. the 15 min "psych evaluation" alone was $400. oh, and they still sent me home that night. it cost me $2k to not take my life. america's healthcare system is so fucked lol

[Danielle Laura @DanielleeeLaura]

One of my favorite things is when you can tell that a gf forced her significant other to post them on social media

[Danielle Laura @DanielleeeLaura]

Do you ever just sit and think about how there are so many beautiful places on this fucking planet and that you don’t have enough time or money to see them all in your lifetime????

[Danielle Laura @DanielleeeLaura]

If I don’t get an email from Zach Bryan in the next 2 days and 8 hours I seriously fear for myself and everyone around me

[Danielle Laura @DanielleeeLaura]

Life really does come full circle because all of my patients (70s-90s) always refer to the other patients as “old timers” and “old men/women” as if they themselves are not in fact also old

[Caitlin 🚗 🧀 Driscoll @TeacherOnTopic]

The best baby age is when they say "baby" when they see another baby as though they themselves are not in fact also a baby.

[😗 @_emweezyyy]

if you think about it the gym is basically a silent disco

[Danielle Laura @DanielleeeLaura]

@Nacoandcheese Add it to the list of our podcast topics

[sydney @ssyddddd]

I am a nepo baby ( still on my moms ezpass)

[Danielle Laura @DanielleeeLaura]

@red_violetred I still don’t know how I see the ending, like which way I think is true! Def read silent patient! I’m finishing my book tonight and then starting Luckiest Girl Alive, will report back on how it is

[Danielle Laura @DanielleeeLaura]

@red_violetred Ready Verity if you haven’t yet! I’m not a huge romance fan so I was always eh about Colleen Hoover but such a crazy thriller! Or The Silent Patient!

[Danielle Laura @DanielleeeLaura]

My toxic trait is that I really think I could pull Travis Kelce with my personality if I ever got the opportunity to meet him

[Danielle Laura @DanielleeeLaura]

You don’t realize how toxic/controlling your partner and relationship really were until you’re talking to someone saying something that feels completely normal (bc you were conditioned to think so) and then you see their horrified facial expression

[Alyssa Limperis @alyssalimp]

The Domino’s delivery car should sell loose pizzas. No need to order just when u see the beautiful luminous plastic domino atop a sedan & get the immediate urge to have a pie you can knock on the window & grab a loosie. Cash. Just cheese. Larges of course. Lives would be changed.

[Danielle Karmazyn @Kaarmmm]

Personally victimized by my snap memories 2022 recap