Carlos SpicyWeiner

This definitely is not Bruce Wayne or Batman. I am a purveyor of dick jokes. Not because I want to but because I have to

[Carlos SpicyWeiner @DaveManimal]

@realDonaldTrump Are you literally retarded? Did you just say you don't want one of these smartest people to ever live to protect you?

[The Orville @TheOrville]

Xelaya is just that beautiful. 😮 #TheOrville

[Carlos SpicyWeiner @DaveManimal]

This motherfucker ends up committing suicide? There is no amount of ass fucking he doesn't deserve! If I believed in God I fucking hope this cocksucker is still getting punished. The fucking end

[Carlos SpicyWeiner @DaveManimal]

@MrMikeCalta @GalvinSeriously you guys were right with abducted in plain sight. I'm 22 minutes in and can't believe how fucking retarded these people are. Are you GODDAMN KIDDING ME! He jerked another guy off?!? Fucking kid stuff?!? Are you GODDAMN KIDDING ME!!!

[Carlos SpicyWeiner @DaveManimal]

The wife put her on THE FUCKING PLANE TO JACKSON HOLE! Are you GODDAMN KIDDING ME!

[Carlos SpicyWeiner @DaveManimal]

@billsfanmonica Get that big dick energy girl! And keep being you on the radio, fuck those haters with that big dick energy! #NothingButLove

[Kathy Griffin @kathygriffin]

I've known @CaslerNoel for years. He has always been super professional and discreet. I'm so glad he's decided to reveal this important information about Trump. Thank you Noel, I know this isn't easy.

[Carlos SpicyWeiner @DaveManimal]

I recently found out that my system can take large amounts of whiskey but let me get one bite of @Chilis garbage food and I might as well wear a diaper

[Carlos SpicyWeiner @DaveManimal]

@missmorenab Not to make it awkward but none, you have natural beauty, please use it

[Carlos SpicyWeiner @DaveManimal]

Alright @MrPeanut how in TF is anyone outside of Illinois supposed to get this beer? Also, isn't Georgia the peanut state?

[Carlos SpicyWeiner @DaveManimal]

@CNN I just bought that same knife at Target. It's pretty sharp

[Carlos SpicyWeiner @DaveManimal]

THANK YOU @TheJohnSenning for saying what we're all thinking. Springsteen fucking sucks

[Carlos SpicyWeiner @DaveManimal]

@britneyspears Girl, you got a sling shot for pants!😂😂

[Carlos SpicyWeiner @DaveManimal]

#IRememberATime when Pepperidge Farm remembers

[Carlos SpicyWeiner @DaveManimal]

Everyday I look at Trumps twitter (for the buffonery) by typing in D-O-N and then I realized, I'm not following @DonCheadle, problem corrected