David Ornstein

Parody account :)

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

🚨 EXCL: #RMFC view package as attractive, with Martinelli regarded internally as strong competition/cover for Diomande. Discussions ongoing; no agreement yet as talks continue @TheAthleticFC

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

🚨 EXCL: Arsenal submit offer to sign Vinicius Junior from Real Madrid. #AFC proposal worth €40m + Gabriel Martinelli. Bid received by #RMFC with no decision yet as talks remain at an early stage. Madrid���s stance unchanged but discussions expected to continue @TheAthleticFC

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

🚨 EXCL: Arsenal submit offer to sign Vinicius Junior from Real Madrid. #AFC proposal worth €40m + Gabriel Martinelli. Bid received by #RMFC with no decision yet as talks remain at an early stage. Madrid’s stance unchanged but discussions expected to continue @TheAthleticFC

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

🚨 Understand Morgan Rogers rejected the chance to join Arsenal despite positive talks, player not convinced by sporting project. Preference is to avoid competing for minutes with Max Dowman. @TheAthleticFC

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

🚨 Manchester United agree to re-sign Jadon Sancho as a free agent. 26yo England international returns to #MUFC after becoming available on the open market. Medical scheduled & formalities under way. Long-term contract agreed - move backed by INEOS leadership @TheAthleticFC

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

@RivalsBanter @12thmantweets_

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

🚨⚽BREAKING : Arsene Wenger has launched a $44 billion + $1 bid for Twitter... [@TheAthletic]
#Twitter #ElonMuskTwitter

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

🚨⚽Donny Van de Beek : "I'm done with this shit. Ragnickelodeon is just Ole part 2. Get me out of this club NOW"

Donny VDB is furious over being left out of the starting XI once again vs Aston Villa.
#MUFC

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

@molezanimations @LoganPaul INTER-esting

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

🚨⚽BREAKING : @LoganPaul has contacted Roman Abramovich over a potential of buying Chelsea FC.

Logan says his "dawg" Christian Pulisic was a main factor in making this huge decision. More to follow...
#CFC #Chelsea

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

⚽🚨 Reporter : "What's your favourite hardware device?"

Lukaku : "It's gotta be the prINTER, It holds an important place in my heart and I feel like I have a special connection with it."
#Chelsea #CFC

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

⚽🚨Reporter : "What are your thoughts on Google Chrome?"

Lukaku : "Yeah chrome is a great browser but it doesn't hit the same as Inter-net Explorer"
#Lukaku

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

🚨⚽Lukaku : "I am glad to announce I will be naming my kids INTER and MILAN when they are born. And yeah my mate Lautaro told to apologise to the Chelsea fans. So sorry, I guess"
#CFC #Lukaku

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

⚽🚨NEW : Aubameyang and Lukaku have created a Whatsapp group called "Naughty bitches".

Grealish and Foden are the front runners to be added next.
[@TheAthleticUK]

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

⚽🚨NEW : Ralf Ragnick has decided to drop Ronaldo for the upcoming match against Burnley. He's also going to be looking for a replacement in January.

Danny Welbeck is a name being discussed among the management. [@FabrizioRomano]
#MUFC

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

⚽🚨BREAKING : The admin of this account is a Manchester United fan. [@footbaIforaII]
#MUFC

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

🚨⚽STAT : Manchester United haven't won a single game this season in which they scored lesser goals than the opponent. [@themichaelowen]
#MUFC

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

⚽🚨 NEW : Arsenal have made contact with Ole Gunnar Solskjaer in the last few hours to discuss a potential replacement of Mikel Arteta.

The other candidates are Gervinho, Marouane Chamakh and Alex Song.
[@skysports_sheth]

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

⚽️🚨| NEW: Antonio Conte will be given a January budget of €150m to get Spurs competing.

His primary targets are Jermain Defoe (39), Peter Crouch (40) and Fabio Quagliarella (38).

[@TheAthleticUK]

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstelln]

🚨⚽BREAKING : Lionel Messi has decided to give his 7th Ballon d'or to Fred.

Says it would be "daylight robbery" not seeing his idol lift the prestigious award.
#MUFC