Dave stan

🇦🇺 True-blue Aussie country bloke. Straight talk, Aussie humour, politics and everyday life. Not here to please everyone. Just calling it as I see it. 🍻

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

@annieaussie60 Might be cheaper to feed the horse than fill the bloody tank! Just watch Woolies start charging $2 a carrot and the servo introduce a hay surcharge. We're all going to need a bloody paddock at this rate!

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

Being an adult in Australia is bloody expensive! 😂 Woolies milk needs a loan, filling the ute costs a fortune and the power bill has you eating dinner by candlelight! 🤣
What's gone so bloody expensive you've had enough? 🇦🇺

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

@annieaussie60 Bloody oath! Truckies are practically hauling the fuel bill instead of the load, and farmers will need to sell a bloody cow just to fill the tractor! 😂 At this rate, the only thing running cheap is the wheelbarrow!

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

@annieaussie60 Bloody oath! If a little Hyundai Venue costs that much to fill, imagine what the poor buggers driving a LandCruiser are going through! Might be cheaper to push the bloody thing to work

[Rob Smith @Ausbobsmit]

Royal commission sham. Taxpayers set to foot the bill.

The Royal Commission was setup by Labor to investigate themselves. Nothing will come of it. Only more pain for the taxpayer, as they are set to pay for Dan Andrews and his legal team.

$100 billion bucks missing and he milks us dry day after day.

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

@Ausbobsmit Bloody hell! It's like asking the fox to investigate the chook shed, then sending the taxpayer the bill for the fox's lawyer! 😂🇦🇺 $100 billion gone and we're still paying the entry fee. When does the taxpayer get a bloody refund? 🤣

[🜲 Harriet @HarrietPJones]

🇦🇺 AUSSIE EXCUSE BINGO 😂
One point for every excuse in the picture you’ve actually used. Count each square once.

0–2: Rookie
3–5: Local
6–9: Excuse legend 🏆

“Already took my bra off” is a legally binding cancellation in this house. Once the girls are off duty, so am I.

👇 What’s your score and what excuse have I missed?
#OnlyInAustralia #AussieHumour #Bingo

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

@HarrietPJones @resonancetone @Mr_Lockwood1 @Dedicated_Degen @rescueldn @treb_btc @AlyssaDerstine @lindame55ina @LisaLisa @barkeep1347 @Yummy_TheArtist 😂 Once the bra’s off and the trackies are on, the night’s bloody cancelled! You’d need a search warrant to get me out!
What’s your best excuse for knocking back a night out? 🇦🇺🤣

[🜲 Harriet @HarrietPJones]

🇦🇺 Congratulations, you’ve inherited a pub. The carpet’s questionable and the galah’s in management. 😂

Pick one number + one letter from the picture, then write your pub’s slogan.

Mine: 4B — The Lost Thong
“Come for lunch. Leave with one shoe.”

👇 What’s your pub called, and what’s going on the sign?

#OnlyInAustralia #AussieHumour #NameThePub

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

@HarrietPJones @AlyssaDerstine @barkeep1347 @lindame55ina @Dedicated_Degen @Mr_Lockwood1 @BEASTfitHUSTLER @Rizzabeast @rescueldn @resonancetone @LisaLisa 7C — The Drunken Dunny 😂🇦🇺
"Cold beer, hot pies and nobody knows who's driving the bloody tractor home."
Publican's lost at the pokies, chef's gone missing for smoko and the beer's dearer than a doctor's appointment
Fair dinkum I've seen better organised pubs at closing time🍺😂

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

@aus_marches One tiny tweak to make it even more natural:
"56 days on the road and thousands still showing up in the rain! Bloody hell, that's commitment. 😂🇦🇺 How many snags does Canberra need to smell before someone wakes up? 😂"

[NoMoreGulags @FreedomAus80100]

• 1.9 million migrants
• CFMEU, NDIS Fraud
• Misinfo/disinfo laws
• Digital ID
• “Hate Crimes” bill

the worst Prime Minister in my lifetime

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

@FreedomAus80100 1.9 million migrants, CFMEU dramas, NDIS rorts, digital ID, misinformation laws and hate crime bills. Bloody hell, Albo, what haven't you got your fingers in? 😂
Australia's turning into one big Bunnings sausage sizzle and nobody can find the bloody tongs! 🇦🇺😂

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

@Ausbobsmit Fair dinkum, you couldn't make this stuff up if you had a schooner and a spare afternoon. 🤣

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

Gina Rinehart denies ‘secretly dictating’ One Nation policy after leaked audio
Fair dinkum, Gina and Pauline have Canberra rattled again! 😂
Pauline doesn't need anyone telling her what to say. She's been giving the pollies curry for years all on her own. Good on her! 🇦🇺😂

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

LUNCH TIME IN AUSTRALIA 🇦🇺😂
Boss reckons I'm flat out. Yeah, flat out raiding the fridge for something that isn't yesterday's leftovers. 😂 Payday's that far away I'm considering a second job selling blood.
What are you blokes scoffing down? 😂

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

@annieaussie60 Fair dinkum, they’ve turned the countryside into a giant bloody ceiling fan showroom. 😂🌬️ The birds aren’t impressed, the farmers aren’t happy, and the view looks like a washing machine instruction manual! 🇦🇺

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

Nationals leader Matt Canavan supports Paris Agreement but says EU trade deal goes too far
Canavan’s happy with Paris but reckons the EU’s gone troppo. 😂 Rather have a nuclear reactor next door than a wind turbine. Fair dinkum, mate, your neighbours must love you! 🇦🇺😂

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

MONDAY IN AUSTRALIA 🇦🇺😂
Coffee’s weak, the bank account’s weaker, and the boss reckons we’re all living the dream.
Meanwhile, petrol’s dearer than a pub steak and the power bill looks like a ransom note.
Anyway, who’s ready to smash another week? 😂
#AussieHumour #MondayMorning

[Dave stan @Davo_1970]

@OneNationVic 12 years of Labor wrecking Victoria and the Libs are busy having a crack at Pauline Hanson. 😂
Fair dinkum, they’re fighting over who gets the steering wheel while Labor’s driving the bloody thing into a ditch.
Albo must be pissing himself laughing. 🇦🇺