Derrek Niles

Just a normal person who like to see things differently. Mostly SFW. My tweets are my own, but some times great minds do think alike.

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

You Didn't Get Her The Right Gift For Christmas Do Over Day
#RenameValentinesDay

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

They actually did fit
#My4WordConfession

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

Mötley Crüel Summer
#MashUpASongAndBand

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

#WhyIWasNotInvitedToTheXmasParty

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

It was my Ex Miss Xmas party.
#WhyIWasNotInvitedToTheXmasParty

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

Families that can't afford the Elf on the Shelf opt for the cheaper Grinch on the Bench that can be blamed for missing presents.
#FakeElfOnTheShelfFacts

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

Pepper - Mint
#BadCandyCaneFlavors

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

In private
#BestPlacesToJingle

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

Aaron Rodgers will need to get x-rays after Green Bay's win over Chicago Sunday night. The Packers reported that his toe was re-injured by Chris Collinsworth's game-long man crush.
@absrdNEWS

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

Advice
#DumbFringeBenefits

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

A woman invented the gift bag, but a man perfected it by adding the tissue paper
#FakeGiftWrappingFacts

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

Nobody ever just puts a bow on a gift because they were too lazy to wrap it
#FakeGiftWrappingFacts

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

All gifts are better when wrapped with bacon
#FakeGiftWrappingFacts

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

It takes longer to unwrap a gift than to wrap it
#FakeGiftWrappingFacts

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

Wearing wire for the feds
#DisappointFamilyIn5words

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

Appeared on Saturday Night Live
#DisappointFamilyIn5words

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

@BeckyQuick It's stupid advice... for dumb people. Smart people will read the article to understand the basis of the stated opinion and the determine if this is a good or bad idea for them.

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

Any other tip is better than the tip of your tongue
#TipsToHelpYouRemember

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

Bats
#OddChristmasTreeDecoration

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

Dump them in the waters around the Island of Misfit Toys
#WhatToDoWithUnwantedGifts

[Derrek Niles @DeeNiled]

Bernie Sanders is their Secret Santa
#RichFolkHolidayProblems