Derick Uber

[Derick Uber @DerickUber]

“@MayExie: I am a god.”

[Adult Humor 18+ @AduItHumour]

Women's hockey? You mean sweeping?

[UberFacts @UberFacts]

In the US, staged wrestling is called “pro wrestling” while real wrestling is called “amateur wrestling.”

[Derick Uber @DerickUber]

“@Chloe_Herrmann5: “@allsoftball365: I pretend like I don't care but I care so much I'm gonna explode””

[Derick Uber @DerickUber]

@trevorw1997 you should drop to 106

[UberFacts @UberFacts]

A Swedish couple named their kid "Brfxxccxxmnpcccclllmmnprxvclmnckssqlbb11116." The name is pronounced "Albin."

[Not Corrupt Media @NotCorruptMedia]

Zipper won't stay up? Flip it to the down position, it "locks" the zipper.

[UberFacts @UberFacts]

People who stay up later at night are likely to be more intelligent than those who go to bed early.

[UberFacts @UberFacts]

When a male honey bee climaxes during sex, his testicles explode and he dies.

[Derick Uber @DerickUber]

I got food pants. These are awesome. Now we can match Brady. Take them to camp with us? bradyredfoot http://t.co/AsHZQ1zM8v

[Derick Uber @DerickUber]

Michale got stuck@in this tractor. You are supposed to pull the lever not push. mike_jac0b http://t.co/Logk1n55Of

[Derick Uber @DerickUber]

This is Danny our chef at the hibachi steakhouse. This is my favorite place to eat. You don't leave… http://t.co/DxtZFIVymj

[Derick Uber @DerickUber]

What kind of soup is this. At the hibachi steak house. http://t.co/tue2s89S9h

[Derick Uber @DerickUber]

Getting hit in the throat by a baseball sorta hurts. It is going to be soar tomorrow. @Robert_pelt @Cjsnyder18 @Zack_Urey

[Derick Uber @DerickUber]

When Mr. May drives by your house and he just watches you. All I thought was what the he**