Derrick Gregory

I'm in a band with a dog. He barks while I eat Cheetos. It's indie, you wouldn't get it. @foraseasonmusic

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

Mr Musk......

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

This morning I was at the gym and this guy came up and asked me how many more sets I had left and I was like “I just got one more and I’ll be out of your hair!”

But the guy was bald.

And his face was like 😐

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

75% of the clothes in my closet no longer fit me, but my toxic trait is thinking at some point I’ll lose enough weight to fit into them again.

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

Sir, unfortunately, "having a mullet" is not tax deductible... Yes, sir, even if it is solely used for business in the front

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

“He is Risen! Now look at this picture of my family.”
- people on Easter

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

My @RamsNFL playoff win reaction. Wait till the end #rams #RamsHouse #49ersVSRams
@CooperKupp
@AaronDonald97
@obj
@VonMiller
@VanJefferson12
@troyreeder9

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

Cowboy fans at the moment

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

If the Grinch was a Realtor. #TheGrinch #Grinch #realtor

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

Well. Looks like I won’t be falling asleep tonight.

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

Me, every day @ 5pm.

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

A Pilgrim tries to buy a house in 2021.

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

Dogs getting fed at a different time due to Daylight Savings:

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

Everyone... please gather around for today’s prayer thank you.

*clears throat*
*bows head*
*closes eyes*

Our Matt Stafford, who art in Los Angeles,
hallowed be thy name,
thy completions come,
thy touchdowns be done,
on the field as it is in Heaven

amen

#GORAMS

[Los Angeles Rams @RamsNFL]

Our house. Your house. #RamsHouse

‼️ IT'S GAMEDAY ‼️

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but put deodorant on before you go to the gym.

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

Boxing just seems like a lot of work for a belt that won't even hold your pants up.

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

I was homeschooled so my "back to school pictures" were me just standing in front of my house before I had to go back inside.

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

WE WATCHED O'ER RAMPARTS
UNDER THE MOOOON
YOU GOT THE KINDA BANNER THAT GAVE US PROOOF
GIMME YOUR FREE
MAKE EM BRAVE
OR ELSE FORGET ABOUT IT -- Carlos Santana, playing the star spangled banner, at a 4th of July show.

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

Sitting around the fire place, my mom reminiscing about my brothers C section.. Happy Mothers Day

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

Happy Mother's Day Mom...You birthed & raised me, but I've had to explain how to take a photo on your iPhone 87,000 times, so let's just call it even.

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

G'DAY, MAY-8 (that's a gday mate joke). New Real Estate Listing Video coming soon 🐍 🐊

[Derrick Gregory @DerrickJGregory]

Lol my brothers new Harry Potter boots