davib

[davib @Dmo730]

*inventor of the treadmill* probably

“What if we walked… but didn’t fucking go anywhere?”

[davib @Dmo730]

Sometimes I feel disappointed in myself, and then I see other humans and I realize that I am actually very normal and highly functioning

[davib @Dmo730]

I tink my favorite history fact is when Lincoln supposedly gave a speech that was so good everyone present forgot to record it so we don’t know what he said

[davib @Dmo730]

We should start calling people from the Netherlands Neanderthals instead of Dutch

[davib @Dmo730]

Do you think Joseph was ever upset that Jesus didn’t take over the family business?

[davib @Dmo730]

Do you think horses are upset that we called dogs man’s best friend?

[davib @Dmo730]

I’ve come to the conclusion that life would be significantly easier if I was dumb

[davib @Dmo730]

@_itslilyw If you say so

[davib @Dmo730]

@Swishy_Pants Facts

[davib @Dmo730]

@401houses Can’t relate

[davib @Dmo730]

@401houses The pale baldness makes you feel some typa way?

[davib @Dmo730]

@_itslilyw Factual

[davib @Dmo730]

@401houses Well I think it might be an action based on a state

[davib @Dmo730]

@_itslilyw Amen 🙏

[davib @Dmo730]

Born to sleep
Forced to shit

[davib @Dmo730]

I get kinda nervous when the shower curtain in a bathroom is closed. Like who’s back there?

[davib @Dmo730]

@Swishy_Pants You’re welcome

[davib @Dmo730]

@Swishy_Pants Some killer deals