Don't Blue Check Me

News, Politics, Vets, Humor

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

🧵 People are terrible at cost-benefit analysis. Especially if one of the costs makes them feel weird.

What's more important, your kids' education or you avoiding the feeling that other parents look at you like you're crazy?

You don't even like those parents or their kids (1/n)

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

@emigre80 Did he kill your dog or something?

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

BREAKING: Current thing supporter mad at harmless joke.

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

@PersuasionRisng Looking forward to them!

[Mr. Edgelord Walmart Guy @ASo1omons]

Reach out.

Whether it's to your friends, coworkers, family, or here.

I'll take a long night over the alternative everytime.

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

That's a lot of Monday morning QB-ing for a split second decision.

The time it took you to write this tweet was longer than Kyle had to determine if the guy with a handgun aimed at his head was planning on shooting him.

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

@ChadWhitemanFL @MaybeThatTommy People tell me "Don't" all the time, usually right before a bad joke.

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

@PersuasionRisng Class is in first place, sex is a distant second.

Atlanta Braves vs. Wichita Under-6 Tee-Ball.

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

We need BDE CDR level approval for this fire mission.

[RevolverEnforcer @Rev_Enforcer]

Hey @ASo1omons how accurate is this?

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

They really are Star Wars bad guys...

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

@WarPath2pt0 *Shooting hand.
For those of us that have messed up eye-hand dominance.

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

1. Far away events can affect us.
2. We can't know what's going on far away without it being told/reported.
3. Most restrictive government on the planet and state run media.

1+2+3= Of course they'll make shit up to try and hurt us.

[Jordan Schachtel @JordanSchachtel]

The Psyop is on

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

*My receipt was not approved, so everything after is an educated guess. Maybe they'll need a stool sample too.

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

Kellogg's current promotion requires you to:
1. Save receipt
2. Take picture of receipt
3. Create account with password
4. Submit receipt for review
5. Wait for approval*
6. Claim your rewards
7. Link rewards to Microsoft account

And they expect people to do all this?

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

@RiflemanIIC The parodies are someone else's reality.

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

@LookingOver People save up to go to games now, $100/ticket, plus parking, plus any upcharged food, souvenirs, etc.

All this to see their favorite players. Then the favorite players show that they don't care about their fans, the ones that support their way of life.

Ego, pride, disdain.

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

They want you to eat this shit.

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

You are the dumbest person ever to walk the earth.

[Thomas L. Friedman @tomfriedman]

My column: Ukraine Is the First Real World War https://t.co/lKN6uuf9sB

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

@NotNJ_Taxman The friction between celebrities and common people will increase.

My hope is that it presents a chance for celebrity worship to pass.

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

"How can I make this PH ceremony about me?"

[I am become Life. @MikePerryavatar]

Here's then Colonel Donald Bolduc in the background wearing shades. He took a day off from losing the war in Afghanistan to come schmooze Miller, who's next to him, at a Purple Heart ceremony for 2 young soldiers who soaked up some RPG fragments.

[Don't Blue Check Me @DontFollowMeMNT]

Behold, the worst type of officer.
Prideful, petty, and useless.

[I am become Life. @MikePerryavatar]

Watching colonels become visibly anxious in my presence was never not fun. "Alarms go off when I enter the building."