Dillon Sheridan

Hey, the names Dillon.

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

YOU'VE GOTTA BE FUCKING KIDDING ME! I DO ALL THOSE FUCKING DISHES AND IMMEDIATELY THEY DECIDED TO USE A POT AND BOWL AND DON'T CLEAN UP AFTER THEMSELVES!?! GOD FUCKING DAMN IT! I WANNA FUCKING KILL MYSELF SON OF FUCKING BITCH!

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

@sleepyshitpost So apparently it makes fun of vocal stimming. But like, I do vocal stimming and find myself saying "reeee" and "screeee" unironically.

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

So apparently "Screeeee" and "Reeeeeee" are ableist? I legit had no fucking idea. I thought it was just something that people yelled to be funny or when they're angry.

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

Your roommates ever get mad at you for venting to yourself about how bad of dog owners they are? Yeah, me too.

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

@BrainDumpTweets I agree

[MrBeast @MrBeast]

In 24 hours I’m going to give one random person that retweets this tweet $10,000 in Bitcoin! (Yup, gonna experiment with this instead of cash haha) Make sure you follow me so I can dm you if you win :)

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

I seriously haven't posted on months

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

@notneekolul N-Noooo h-h-how could you! My fr-fragile MM-MMa-MMASCULANITY

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

Lesson of the day when you have a 12 pack of soda. If you're keeping it out of the fridge, and only putting yours in to keep them cold, write names on your cans so your roommates don't fucking take yours!

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

@cinnamontoastk The all mighty Zorg. Mwahahahaha!

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

@MrBeastYT Bro, I appreciate what you do and all. But make sure your employees are correctly cooking the meet. Raw burgers could legitimately kill someone.

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

Visiting the fam for the holidays. Had to stop back at the apartment yesterday, I made sure there were no dishes in the sink when I left. THE SINK HAD SO MANY DISHES IN IT

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

Basically what my roommate said: So here's tips on how to train our dog, when he gooses you, walk towards him, that'll disorient him.

Bro, I'm not the one that is supposed to train him, you are. I appreciate you telling me, bit you need to work with that dog.

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

Their dog does not shut the fuck up.
It's late at night and the fucker is barking at literally nothing.

#shutup #dogs #poorlytrained

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

My roommates dislike my family and think they're always infected with covid. So when I say I'm going to visit, they get physically uncomfortable.

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

Roommate's: Get a water bottle, misplace it, can't tell the difference between the other ones, gets a new one, repeat cycle.

There's no drinkable water in the apartment now.

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

I don't watch Umbrella Academy, but Elliot Page came out as a transman, my roommate who is trans said: "everyone is celebrating and happy for Elliot Page coming out as a transman, and I'm here like, "But we lost another lesbian, y'all.."
I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD MISANDRY IS REAL!

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

@BrainDumpTweets Do it.

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

EXPLAIN
Roommate's dog shits on the floor, roommates cleans it up and tosses the bag in the kitchen trash can. LITERALLY ONLY TAKES LIKE 45 SECONDS TO GO OUT AND THROW IT IN THE DUMPSTER!

#Trainyourdog #pottytrainyourdog #Ilovecats

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

@MrBeastYT Damn dude, that's pretty neat. Here I am living with roommates who won't do that damn dishes.

[Dillon Sheridan @Douillibouilli0]

Dishes are still not done. Is anyone gonna actually do them? I literally did them three times in a damn row.

#lazyroommates #lazy #irresponsable