Dr. Princess 🧜🏻‍♀️

part mermaid, part grumpy cat. DINK for life. things I enjoy: wine, teeth, world travel, science, warm weather, the water, history, the outdoors, true crime.

[Jim Geraghty @jimgeraghty]

"But a goal will not count if a player is offsides."

"When is a player offsides?"

"Whenever anything exciting happens."

[Oasis Mania @OasisMania]

It's nearly Christmas but mentally I'm still here

[ѕєиɪ @zalatwicc]

what's a beginner hobby for someone just getting into being happy

[Dr. Princess 🧜🏻‍♀️ @Dr__Princess__]

@zalatwicc Get some bird feeders

[Dr. Princess 🧜🏻‍♀️ @Dr__Princess__]

@ThrillaRilla369 Yes. Born in 1985, my free range childhood was great. I feel so bad for kids these days, who seem to fluctuate between school, organized sports, sleep, rinse, repeat.

[Dr. Princess 🧜🏻‍♀️ @Dr__Princess__]

@Ask_Spectrum @SpectrumEntUS @SpectrumBiz Spectrum! My business upgraded from Business to Enterprise last year. Despite multiple efforts, I can't access online statements/billing from my Spectrum Enterprise account. No one seems to be able to help me out - can you?  PLEASE! 😊

[Dr. Princess 🧜🏻‍♀️ @Dr__Princess__]

@urangelonline I very much hope her only response to the second text was “👍”

[NFL Memes @NFLMemes]

Bill Belichick’s 24-year-old girlfriend walking around with a ‘Atlanta Falcons Super Bowl 51 Champions’ shirt is almost as crazy as Bill having a bigger rack than her 💀

[Dr. Princess 🧜🏻‍♀️ @Dr__Princess__]

This week’s episode is crazy! So crazy I had to watch the documentary after listening. Where this beach tattoo blew my mind because it’s too atrocious to put into words 🤪 @MurderSmall @Jimmypisfunny @WhismanSucks

[James Lucas @JamesLucasIT]

Colorized historical photos and videos that will make you feel like you're in a time machine 🧵

1. Jerusalem, April 1897

[Jesse Joyce @jessejoyce]

I wrote this cause it’s what I always wanted to say about Trump pretending to be a tough guy.  But we got the amazing @DaveBautista to say it SO much better.  Thanks Dave.  #TrumpIsAWeakLittleBabyBitch

[Dr. Princess 🧜🏻‍♀️ @Dr__Princess__]

@wbaltv11 Fantastic! Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

[Dr. Princess 🧜🏻‍♀️ @Dr__Princess__]

@heckyessica @elonmusk Or maybe a whole bunch of us have never wanted children in the first place? I’m 39 now, and I’ve never wanted kids. There’s nothing selfish about living the kind of life you want to live. I’m happy for those satisfied as parents, I don’t see why that can’t be reciprocated.

[Daily Harry Potter @TheDailyHPotter]

For the lovey Dame Maggie Smith 🥹

[Dr. Princess 🧜🏻‍♀️ @Dr__Princess__]

@tony_pereira72 @NWSTampaBay @FOX13News @weatherchannel @CityofTampa You didn’t expect it to be that bad? Did you not watch any weather reports? 🤔

[Tim Walz @Tim_Walz]

Like all regular people in America's heartland, JD Vance studied at Yale, had his career funded by Silicon Valley billionaires, and wrote a bestseller trashing that community.

Come on.

I can't wait to debate the guy—that is, if he's willing to get off the couch and show up.

[BrooklynDad_Defiant!☮️ @mmpadellan]

OMG, John Oliver says the reason you always find change in couch cushions is because "JD Vance always leaves a tip" 🤣🤣🤣

[Dr. Princess 🧜🏻‍♀️ @Dr__Princess__]

@Jimmypisfunny This is my take 99% of the time. Most humans are too stupid, too lazy, or/& too untrustworthy to pull off that kind of shit off.