that bitch

She/her. Parent. Writer. Gamer. Perpetually angry ball of sass. Mentally spicy. Sometimes I’m funny.

[that bitch @Drink_Death]

@emma_____weaver If they won’t do a bridge fill, an ER will give you a short term script. I’ve done it twice, they gave me up to 2 wks each time.

[that bitch @Drink_Death]

Who in the absolute fuck thought chicken and waffles Oreos were a good idea 🤢

[that bitch @Drink_Death]

@heavensbvnny Had my tubes removed

[T B 💨🪐 @Christi65458114]

“If you smoke weed every day you’re dependent on it!! It’s literally a drug addiction because you’re never truly sober!!” Have you considered I simply don’t care

[that bitch @Drink_Death]

@X_Bill_Gl Yellow

[that bitch @Drink_Death]

Gotta go walk 20 mins and pick up a pizza. Yall think the bestie will mind if I borrow 2 pot holders? I know that shits gonna be hot and it won’t cool in this heat either lol

[Alex Zawacki @achillghost]

We did that, it was Slenderman, and two children almost immediately tried offering it a human sacrifice

[that bitch @Drink_Death]

The besties FIL assaults my senses so bad that if he approached me on the street I’d feel threatened and pepper spray his ass. There is no need to scream when you talk. Like his presence literally both pisses me off and makes me nauseous simultaneously.

[˖ Ritz 𓂀 ݁˖ @ridhima_z]

i love when doctors say "avoid stress" like i can just unsubscribe from economy and become a decorative gargoyle.

[Brooke from Let’s Not Date @TheLetsNotDate]

Every family celebrates Father’s Day differently. I celebrate by convincing men the woman that they just sent unsolicited penile photography to is their daughter.

[cessi 🥤 @ceciiii07]

“You fucking idiot bitch” me to the video game character that I’m in full control of

[that bitch @Drink_Death]

Ah, summer, the horrible time of year where everyone stinks and I hit my breaking point and start screaming at them to buy fucking deodorant cuz they’re a walking fucking biohazard out here gassing us with yeast and BO

[adophie @adophie_]

@ZT2Cans @colligocritters "is that a bug-that-kill-you? oh, never mind, it's just a false bug-that-kills-you"
note: the false bug-that-kills-you still kills you, it's just a liar about it or something

[sexy daily @Eriemmadaily]

@reldrago

[that bitch @Drink_Death]

I’m not saying those two single mom friends should move in together people are fully right but the besties husband is in the hospital so it’s just been us and our 2 boys and yall the productivity and smoothness of the household has been insane

[Baby Rex RAWR @BabyRex12301]

Can all BabyRex’s fwens on the chirp chirps share BabyRex’s art, he being throttled by the chirp chirp overlords an no 1 is seeing his posts 🙏🏻

[Bethel @Bethelofenugu]

i think there's actually nothing better than being randomly told "I love you" after doing something characteristically stupid. Like what do you mean I'm a lovable person and I just did something silly and you thought "of course you would do that. I love you.". No better feeling

[𝒦𝓎𝑜𝓂𝒾 🌸 @pyttkykomi]

Neurodivergents will be like 'I'm so tired' and then refuse to sleep because they haven't had enough me time after surviving the day.

[that bitch @Drink_Death]

Bout to hand my dating life over to the group chat and let them play tamagotchi with it cuz clearly my decisions should not be trusted