Dumb and Dumber qts

We got no food. We got no jobs. Our pets heads are falling off.

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"A tad?! A tad, Lloyd?! You drove almost a 6th of the way across the country in the WRONG DIRECTION!"

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"Alright, who's the DEAD MAN that hit me with the salt shaker?"

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"I just got that old fashioned feeling where I'd do anything to bone her."

"That's a special feeling, Lloyd."

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"Senior citizens, although slow and dangerous behind the wheel, can still serve a purpose. Be right back! Don't you go dyin' on me!"

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"JUST GIMME THE DAMN NUMBER!"

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"Find a happy place... Find a happy place...."

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"We normally don't pick up hitchhikers, buuuut I'm gonna go with my instinct on this one. Saddle up, partner!"

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"So she says 'Do you love me?' And he says 'No! But that's a real nice ski mask!'"

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"The first time I set eyes on Mary Swanson, I just got that old fashioned romantic feeling where I'd do anything to bone her."

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"Man! You are one pathetic loser!"

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of crap about me not listenin to her or something. I dont know. I wasnt really paying attention."

[Jamie Erdahl @JamieErdahl]

That John Denver was full of... RT @PeteAbe: Pretend announcers now doing out of town scores. "How about those Rockies?

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"So you got fired again, eh?" "Yeah. They always freak out when you leave the scene of an accident."

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"Y'know on second thought, you might just wanna run a comb through 'em..."

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"You can't be too careful. Lot of bad drivers out there..."

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"FOOTLONNNNNNG!!! WHO'S GOT THE FOOTLONNNNG?"

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"Tell her I'm rich and, uh, I'm good-looking and, uh, I have a rapist wit."

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"Killer boots, man!"

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"Ohh, look at the buns on that one." "Yeah. He must work out."

[Dumb and Dumber qts @DumbDumberQuote]

"One Half-Teaspoon. For fast effective relief."