Durishious

I like long walks on the beach, going to girlie bars, and cleaning my rifle, if you know what I mean ;)

[Durishious @Durishious]

Spicy burritos and buttsex are two things that get me hollering about the "Ring of Fire" that Johnny Cash sang so much about. #realtalk

[Durishious @Durishious]

Pride Weekend in SF. Time to get out and let the whole world know that San Francisco is still the weirdest city on Earth. #prideweekend #sf

[Durishious @Durishious]

I wish Speaker Boehner wasn't such a pussy. If I were him, I'd start actively sucking cocks in order to inject some brains into my head.

[Durishious @Durishious]

#thatawkwardmoment when you realize the aforementioned boyfriend is a POG

[Durishious @Durishious]

#thatawkwardmoment when you realize the guy across the bar you've been eyeing already has a boyfriend, and he's a power top. #bottomsup

[Durishious @Durishious]

Fuck, Ryan Lochte is such a douche bag!!! Why does he have to be so cute! #lovethoselegs

[Jake Greenwood @Jgreenwood92]

Couple things I'm grateful for: my amazing friends both home and at school, and my liver. Thanks, guys.

[Durishious @Durishious]

Some days, I wish I had a work-appropriate, combustible oral fixation that was always on my mind. But cigarettes kill, so I'll stick to cock

[Durishious @Durishious]

Just woke up with dried drool on the side of my face. At least I think it's drool. Either way, I know which side I slept on.

[Durishious @Durishious]

So, sleeping in my leopard print yoga pants nearly made the staff sergeant burst a vein. Some people just can't handle my #swag

[Durishious @Durishious]

“@Jgreenwood92: Watching pitch perfect. Don't judge us, join us” I'm so totally there #fabulous

[Durishious @Durishious]

I want a AR-15 in the street, and a double barrel, center fire, 12 gauge buck shot in this sheets #choosy

[Durishious @Durishious]

That last tweet sounded dirty...

[Durishious @Durishious]

#thatfeelingwhen you get Blue Falconed by your buddy on the firing range because the jackass next to you got some hot brass down your back.

[Durishious @Durishious]

#excuses "it could be worse Mom, I ONLY got a tramp stamp"

[Durishious @Durishious]

#fleetweek in SF lined up with the parade in #Casto! Can I be two places at once?!? #princessproblems

[Durishious @Durishious]

@Foleys_Flowing #WEAREFUCKED in that case, I'll have Mitt, he seems like the kind to snuggle afterwords.

[Durishious @Durishious]

Morning Drills > Morning wood #PT4ever

[Durishious @Durishious]

@Whoopsie91 I'm so excited Victoria's Secret is opening a shop in #Cowboys stadium, but flights are soooo expensive :((( #princessproblems

[Durishious @Durishious]

Listening to old Backstreet Boys makes me miss the days when JT was out of the closet and Lance Bass was still in it. #heartthrob #hairgel