Devil Doggo

Invincible until proven otherwise// Nicolette

[SUPER LILY KART @lilybeeX3]

dying peacefully at age 90 surrounded by family and friends but I got the martyrdom perk so I drop a grenade, spraying everyone in the room's insides all over the walls instantly

[Man of Action @MindsetVet]

Pointing a GUN at people

[florence 🦐🏳️‍🌈 @morallawwithin]

The whole "you shouldn't vape next to babies on airplanes" ideology is basically a religion.

--Belief in a supreme authority (God/the FAA)
--Strict moral rules that are imposed on everyone (Ten Commandments/"Federal law")
--Threat of punishment for unbelievers (Hell/fines)

[Mr. Honeydew @bestbuddy1998]

Well…regardless of what I think you’ve gone ahead and put them on anyway… Just another example of how nothing I think matters…

[Goob @goobgleeb]

"Only bring the bare necessities to this expedition"

"What about my dog's giant gramophone?":

[John Halo @EpicMasterChief]

The "Hello" into "What's your name" remains the undefeated meta for conversation starting

[fredesque @FredTaming]

[reading a book in first person] i dont remember doing any of this

[matt @mattybtweets69]

Like two ships that crash directly into each other killing everyone in the night

[larrikin @HELLLLHOOOOLE]

Got my horse to water. Now for the easy part

[matt @mattybtweets69]

I used to fear the black mold in my apartment bathroom but now I understand it. It’s here to help me. It’s here to make me feel good.

[Standard Reference Margot @sickfootfour]

walking my 4d hyperdog

[matt @mattybtweets69]

Aaaaand yup the uber driver is taking us right through the valley of the shadow of death

[Skyler Higley @skyler_higley]

the Michelin man is kinda like a Greek god in the sense that he presides over tires and which restaurants are good

[Military History Visualized @MilHiVisualized]

US Rangers ascending point duc hoc 1944 colorized.

[boe @bigsquishyfrog]

Lmaooo living by the sword is so dope. I hope this lifestyle doesn't have any consequences for me later on

[Momoko 🦀 @rotwifey]

hello! i am a marine biologist and today i discovered this species!

[the heart @Fredward3948576]

[waking up chained to a rock] Hell yeah. The only thing that could make this better is if a- [an eagle screeches overhead and dives towards my liver] Yesssss

[matt @mattybtweets69]

Bro last night was exactly as the prophecy foretold

[K @kourtneyinhell]

the older I get the more I start to understand the appeal of birdwatching as a hobby. I do find myself watching these mfs quite often