Rando Pitchfork

I’m a pretty big deal. You should all be better like me. I identify as a ghost. Parody account.

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

I believe in ghosts.

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

This is 9/11 all over again. I can’t believe after all the pissing and moaning I got over #Borderlands3 exclusivity, y’all are just gonna blatantly defend them pulling the same shit BUT WORSE with #HalfLifeAlyx! I’m not buying a Steam Machine for one game!

#ToxicGamers

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

@Paneka_ You’re not fooling me.

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

What a crock of shit. #HalfLifeAlyx EXCLUSIVE to #ValveIndex. I knew they were corrupt!

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

@ExitioRegem No idea. Think I’m pretty close to perfecting my memory loss spell though.

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

I’ve finally perfected my memory loss spell.

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

@ExitioRegem No way that’s crazy talk.

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

@Liamylad I’ll hit up my boys at @SEGA and see if we can arrange something.

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

@Liamylad :O

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

I take full responsibility for the @2K facebook account “problems”. Had to do it to ‘em. This is for blocking my attempts to get #Borderlands on the WiiU. I made my boi @Reggie a promise and y’all made me break it.

Payback’s a beach.

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

@JazzCigars @power_dump @DuvalMagic We had suspicions based on their real-time gameplay statistics that they were engaging in toxic behaviour. We have a zero tolerance policy for such things so a nuke from orbit was the only logical option. It’s only fair after Pearl Harbor.

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

Maybe next time you’ll be nice to me and I won’t need to hit up my private equity friends.

#Kotaku
#SinkingShip
#ByeBye
#HadToDoItToEm

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

It’s a sad day seeing @EA shack up with @steam_games. I thought you were above taking bribes for exclusivity. The absolute nerve!

@PeterMooreLFC is rolling in his grave.

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

@kpalamwar @TimSweeneyEpic Oh lawd we comin

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

#DeathStranding is coming to PC! Best bud @TimSweeneyEpic, you know what to do!

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

Photo-mode for #Borderlands3 on all platforms launched today! Share your in-game photos with me - maybe I’ll retweet :), maybe I’ll save ‘em for my “me time”.

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

69

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

@ExitioRegem I thought it was pretty funny.

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

@tim_weeney @eltonofficial @FortniteGame I’m sure that can be arranged.

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

Put @eltonofficial in @FortniteGame. Do it you cowards.

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

@ExitioRegem @TimSweeneyEpic Does filming the magic bath live add to the value of the product?

[Rando Pitchfork @DuvalSorcery]

Does anyone know how to convert my #bathwater into cold hard cash? I want to build a dungeon and big daddy @TimSweeneyEpic didn’t give me my allowance this week.