rate-this-earthquake richter

rainforest cafe rep, empress of vanished continents, scribe of foolish sprouts
subscribe to my nonsense @

[rate-this-earthquake richter @EDM4bugs]

15 min could save u on car insurance but 15 sec of honda civic could destroy our hero, armadillo

[weird medieval guys @WeirdMedieval]

little creature writing things, switzerland, 16th century

[rate-this-earthquake richter @EDM4bugs]

new substack installment about haunting, healing and zac efron’s bet on it performance xx

https://t.co/Kjumxee9Sl

[rate-this-earthquake richter @EDM4bugs]

@jeffvandermeer my crawfish gets a very disgruntled expression on their face when I accidentally wake them up in the morning. perhaps having a stuffed animal would help them sleep more soundly ?

[rate-this-earthquake richter @EDM4bugs]

it almost halloween who else cream corn gettin haunted ?

[rate-this-earthquake richter @EDM4bugs]

humpty dumpty is the most bottom energy

[rate-this-earthquake richter @EDM4bugs]

one time i asked this guy at the park how he was doing and he said "if i was doing any better i'd need to be two people" and it filled me with hope then and it fills me with hope now

[rate-this-earthquake richter @EDM4bugs]

coming back from 5 month twitter hiatus to show everyone bee paw and then leave again

[shen the bird @Shen_the_Bird]

boss: what is the problem

coworker: [pointing to me] that guy stole my thesaurus

me: he peddles falsehoods

[Sylvia Plath's Food Diary @whatsylviaate]

Grew increasingly sad and tearful through shishkebab and wine supper and felt rather sorry for myself. 3/29/56

[dustin Couch @Dustinkcouch]

nasa employee: oh hey u guys are back early

astronaut: moon's haunted

nasa employee: what?

astronaut: *loading a pistol and getting back on the rocket-ship* moon's haunted

[Marie Balon @balon_marie]

Cycling to work and seeing this weird chain thing on the ground... WHAT IS IT?

I stopped to get a closer look

[rate-this-earthquake richter @EDM4bugs]

@jeffvandermeer turns out my art praxis is basically area x fan art. Not mad about it!

[roo💨 @whois_roo]

Men are just 100 snakes in a bag which is why it’s hard to understand them when they talk

[rate-this-earthquake richter @EDM4bugs]

kitchen nightmares but we're all huddled around a plate of broccoli and the flame of a single candle, whispering abt the sleep paralysis demons that visit us when we're alone

[rate-this-earthquake richter @EDM4bugs]

kitchen nightmares but its a podcast where we cook pastas and invite c list celebrities to talk about their night terrors

[rate-this-earthquake richter @EDM4bugs]

seltzer? U mean water with rabies

[rate-this-earthquake richter @EDM4bugs]

so much of life is hard. googly eyes are easy

[rate-this-earthquake richter @EDM4bugs]

i was beyond sick all weekend until saturday night when I learned mdma is a super duper decongestant

[rate-this-earthquake richter @EDM4bugs]

calling pest control. they teach me to control pests to do my bidding. Bring me a smoothie pests. Sing me a lullaby pest