Red🪐📺💡

“Stop making our hatred of ourselves someone else's job and just stop hating ourselves.”

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

Progeny and heir of a shyness that is criminally vulgar.

[Maryam @hell_line0]

"Well, if that’s sexual assault, then that means countless men have assaulted women."

Ding ding ding.

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

Shit, the final season of my 20s starts in 8 days.

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

I kinda hate how everyone pulls their beanies up to look like foreskins. All I can see is a penis above shoulders.

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

I am no longer marked safe from the Pete Davidson pheromones they put in the Covid vaccine.

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

Geese sunk the Titanic.

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

Blow up the trolley.

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

Gift Receipt: literally says can only be redeemed for a gift card or to use for an exchange.

Lady in front of me today: why can’t I get the cash back for this?
…after the cashier explained why already.

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

Holy fuck, it’s time to start warming up to run the last lap of my 20s.

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

Sorry not sorry, but the Pink Ranger is the best. Nobody else gets to fly. Argument concluded.

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

Queer life is seeing how many mutual gays there are between you and people on Facebook.

[Mark @markofbrooklyn]

The only other virus that attacks and kills T-cells is HIV.

https://t.co/YOplbLbaTB

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

My alcohol tolerance doubles or triples when I cross the causeway I freaking swear.

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

Oh fuck off. People just don’t want to pay you and you want money.

[J.K. Rowling @jk_rowling]

And as for this, I'm appalled. This individual actually advocates reading the books because "nobody needs to know". All fine and dandy until you get drunk and accidentally quote one, sonny. "I never did it in public" won't save you when the police see your Hufflepuff socks. 2/2

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

Does only learning about a Destiny’s Child single in 2022 make me lose my gay status for a week?

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

The Little Mermaid is a good movie. Not a good kids’ movie. Straight up just a good plot with well written characters who have human motivations.
Getting a man as a condition of being human was 100% the villain’s idea an mentioned as a condition of being human.

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

Pink is the next colour and everything else is false.

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

I like my men like my coffee, strong ready to get into me.

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

Pigeons are fucking cute okay.
It’s not their fault they weren’t meant to live in North America but were brought over here and simply refused to die out.
They’re sometimes irritating, but like go to a day care. Cute and sometimes irritating is Mother Nature’s package deal.

[Chris Colfer @chriscolfer]

I barely speak English so it’s always a treat when these guys show up.

[Red🪐📺💡 @ETplayground]

You called a white based on how I dressed, and while I’m not judging you literally fucked your ex landlord to not pay rent.
I respect the play, but don’t fucking slut shame you hypocrite. Jesus wouldn’t like that.