E. W. Roberts

Award winning Author of Storm Front Over Atlantis and City of the Dead series.

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

"With captivating prose and a successful whodunnit approach, Descending Dawn is a great start to a promising series." -Independent Book Review. From Award Winning Author E. W. Roberts.
https://t.co/B3jmbykv6o

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

Best thing I’ve heard all day “2 plus 2 does not equal potato”

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

@otokyo Invite him fishing become good friends with him. Because Your daughter is just trying to piss you off.

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

So I called IT today. Told them I had a problem with the computer logging in to the network. He stated and I quote. Let’s give it some time and see if it fixes itself.

That is not how that works.

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

https://t.co/If37s7jajj

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

Subscribe to Straczynski’s Substack https://t.co/mEywCOBtaV

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

@DzintraSullivan SP-Man — Serial Problemstarter.

Powers:
overhearing conversations not about him
turning “good morning” into conflict
creating drama from absolutely nothing
posting “don’t text me” while waiting for texts
fueled entirely by screenshots and spite

Weakness:
being ignored

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

@DzintraSullivan SP-Man — Sensitive & Petty.

Abilities:
remembers every insult since 2009
says “wow” instead of explaining feelings
can turn “okay” into a threat
reads tone that doesn’t exist
starts arguments with “so we’re just gonna pretend…”

Natural enemy:
someone unbothered.

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

@DzintraSullivan That’s Super Passive-Aggressive Man.
His powers include:
• replying “k”
• saying “interesting” during arguments
• liking old posts from 2014
• standing silently until you feel guilty
• weaponized sighing
Weakness:
“Can you explain what you mean by that?”

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

Why People Are Returning to Retro TV Shows Like The Six Million Dollar Man

https://t.co/EqMCulMOYB

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

@Murk441 Top Lap. That is a strange name

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

@EmilySm43

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

@lady_valor_07 It’s called diversified income

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

@AntiLeftMemes I’m too busy trying to solve this grammar escape room you left on my windshield. ‘You’re car is to close’? Which one? My car, or I am car? will have you toad’? 🐸 Don’t worry though. I’ll move it. Not because of the threat… but because I’m scared you’ll write another note.

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

@MaryamF12389 I’ll grab a juice box, sit in the corner, and think about how biology apparently now works like autocorrect.

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

@MaryamF12389 As a “good husband,” I guess I’ll just nod and say, “Ah yes, the classic accidental baby. Happens all the time. Right next to accidentally ordering a pizza and accidentally buying a house.”

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

@MaryamF12389 Oh wow, “by mistake,” huh? What was it, a whoopsie daisy situation? Tripped, fell, and—boom—entire pregnancy? That’s some Olympic-level clumsiness right there.

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

@AntiLeftMemes Never heard of leftover bacon…….

[E. W. Roberts @EWRwriter]

@MaryamF12389 How did she do it by mistake? Did she jump on a strange dick and go oh, I thought you were my husband. My Mistake.