Eastbound and Down

[ESPN @espn]

CHELSEA GREEN IS THE INTERIM WWE WOMEN'S CHAMP 🍿

LISTEN TO THE CROWD 💥 #SummerSlam

[Kendall Baker @kendallbaker]

Absolutely nothing could have prepared me for the national anthem at the first Women’s Pro Baseball League tonight

[FADE @FadeAwayMedia]

THE FACT THAT BROCK LESNAR IS BEST FRIENDS WITH THE MODERN FAMILY CAST IS HILARIOUS 😭

They recreated their iconic video at SummerSlam last night 💀

#SummerSlam

[Graham "GSM" Matthews @WrestleRant]

RANDY ORTON WITH THE RUN-IN RIGHT UNDERNEATH US OMG!!!!! #SummerSlam

[Matt Walsh @MattWalshBlog]

A woman who confessed to having anxiety attacks around white people wants to be the governor of Wisconsin, an 85 percent white state. If this doesn’t immediately destroy her campaign and career then we’re doomed as a country.

[The Vigilant Fox 🦊 @VigilantFox]

Bill Maher’s audience audibly gasps when he reads what the Democratic Socialists of America are actually saying out loud:

MAHER: “Trump has told 1 trillion lies, but when he says the DSA are actually COMMUNISTS, that’s not one of them.”

“And it’s not hard to prove it just by quoting the DSA and their candidates.”

“J.D. Vance was on the show, and I told him that if the Democratic Party keeps going in the direction of the DSA, my vote was in play. And all I heard all vacation was, ‘Oh, my God, you’re a Republican now.’ No, that's not what I said. I said in play, and here’s why.”

“Because not a week goes by where I don’t read about some newly chosen, exciting new face in the Democratic Party. And then when that face opens its mouth, the Communist Manifesto or some other crazy shit comes out! Again.”

“Let’s just read the quotes. The DSA platform says: ‘You work as much as you are able and no more than needed.’ If that was any closer to Karl Marx’s dictum, from each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs, they’d be sued for plagiarism.”

“New York Mayor Mamdani once tweeted, Karl Marx’s words exactly. They’re not trying to hide it. Their most popular influencer, Hasan Piker, thinks communism is so groovy, he laments the fall of two of the most murderous regimes in history, the Soviet Union and Chairman Mao's China.”

“Mamdani's aide, his top aide, Cea Weaver, said, ‘If you don't believe in the government's sacred right to seize property, it's over.’ And ‘impoverish the white middle class.’ What? That's a goal? You know you're supposed to scare people into voting for you, right?”

“One of the new, soon-to-be Democratic congresspeople, Darlesia Chavalier, supports seizing all properties from landlords and said, ‘Seize the means of production.’ Mamdani has said ‘The end goal is seizing the means of production.’ I think they want to seize the means of production.”

“Now, maybe you missed that in school or missed school altogether, but THAT'S COMMUNISM.”

“Now the coalition within the DSA called the Marxist Unity Group is in ascendance. And I must take them at their word. When their words include, ‘Our commitment is to the long-term struggle for a fully liberated classless society. In a word, communism.’”

“What do they have to do, tweet out ‘Elect more communists’? Oh, yeah, Cea Weaver did that.”

[Shows tweet, audience audibly gasps]

“Yes, [she really did that]! ... People gotta realize this is going on.”

[il Donaldo Trumpo @PapiTrumpo]

WHO DID THIS???🤣🤣🤣

[Bobby Spence @postcrabcore]

Damn this would be sick though lol

[Rachel Wilson @Rach4Patriarchy]

The fact that Trump DID stop this in the United States is the most important thing to me. There’s not really any other issue that matters as much in politics right now. this is my children and grandchildren‘s future.

[Benny Johnson @bennyjohnson]

🚨STOP SCROLLING: Everyone Should Bear Witness To This Savage TAKEDOWN of Dr. Fauci by Senator Josh Hawley.

Watch as he DECIMATES Fauci and makes him SQUIRM in his seat.

This is how all of our Representatives and Senators in Congress should act.

Total MASTERCLASS

[Gia Macool @GiaMMacool]

Every woman alive 😂

[Cruella_Seville @Cruella_Seville]

I’m going to Costco… I think it’ll fit my small dog.
Rawr 🦖

[kay🔆 @novusluna]

Me grabbing clothes out the dryer without a basket

[Tawadotcom @Tawadotcom]

Imagine Going to School the Next Day.

[Amazing Things @amazingthings_]

An incredible wind-powered drummer made entirely from scrap metal

[folie à deux @folieadeeux]

Devrilmek üzere olan tır'a yardıma giden koca yürekli arkadaş.

[Ben Bankas @BenBankas]

FIFA is finally over…

[90s WWE @90sWWE]

🤣🤣🤣

[Club Shay Shay @ClubShayShay]

"Here’s the joke I told Taylor Swift that made her laugh:

A guy runs into an old friend and he says, 'Hey, I'm dating twins now!'

His friend says, 'Ooh, twins? That’s really hot. How do you tell them apart?'

He goes, 'It’s really easy. Natalie paints her fingernails purple, and Mark has a c*ck.'" - Andrew Santino

[GoldenAgeOfScreen @GoldenAgeScreen]

Norm Macdonald - “Patton Oswalt said he thought the worst part of the Cosby thing was the hypocrisy…. I disagree.”

Jerry Seinfeld - “You disagree?”

Norm Macdonald - “Yeah…. I think it was the r*ping.”