Ellie

Writer, reader. She/her. Foul-mouthed Rhodes scholar wannabe. Not speaking for my employer. Don’t just acknowledge the land, support Indigenous causes.

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

Kid: Mom, you look just like a monster
Husband: Hey, let’s work on this. “Mama, you look so beautiful”
Kid: Mama, you look like a beautiful monster

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@lyzl Recently I wore a slightly cropped top *inside my own home* and my daughter looked me up and down and said "why do you even wear that shirt if it doesn't fit?"

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@lyzl @MPR @AngelaDavisMPR I can't believe I missed that you were going to be on Angela's show! You're a gift. (So is she)

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@emilyfoxkaplan @blgtylr Lady. Did you ... consider for a moment - if not Googling who you're talking at - maybe taking a peek at the profile?

I do wonder what might lead one such as yourself to such conclusions 🤔

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@lyzl Pardon my french but this is SO FUCKIN BOSS.

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@blgtylr @lancerichardson You have never sounded younger

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

Do yourself a favor, conjure up some feelings, and please go read this microfiction by the exceedingly brilliant @simonashton https://t.co/DxEetbOuL8 who used to pretend not to be a writer.

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@strangestardust @beerinator It would be one thing if it were funny

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@tmitsoff @dianealsoraps Aw shucks. How’s life, Tom??

[derek guy @dieworkwear]

if you're a young person, ask a middle-aged man what music they listened to in the 90s. let them talk for 30 mins. act interested and say "oh wow no way that's so cool." after that you can ask them for any favor

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@ayisha @JanelleMonae @TheCurrent ahhhhh I love her/this

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@hypatia67 A day YOUNGER than Jennifer Dawn! Guess being a hateful sack of garbage ages you.

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@TimGavrich So you were hoping Kendall would kill himself in the final scene?

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@lyzl Or *same*. So busy texting about Succession my thumbs are wearing out.

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@lyzl Sam’s. We ought to remedy.

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

Face eggs

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@TheNotoriousRBF One made it 🥺

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

The ugliest cutest

(Attn @TheNotoriousRBF)

Alt: video of baby finches in a nest tucked inside a porch light

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@ayisha You got to do that??? Honestly, dream job. (Also what cool job *haven't* you had?)

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

@lyzl Utterly heartbreaking.

[Ellie @EleanorPie]

It happened to me: I moved to the midwest and now my kid pronounces "crayon" with one syllable - "cran"