Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦

Lawyer. Nerd. History Buff. Home Chef. Eternally Curious.

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

I’ll never forget in law school when I got my first legal writing assignment back with the note “don’t try to sound like a lawyer” because I had used the word “heretofore”

Ma’am, I’m not “trying to sound like a lawyer” - I read too much Jane Austen and this is how I talk now.

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@notcapnamerica My husband: she has some unfortunate bone structure.

Me: I wouldn’t exactly call that bone “structure”

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@AngryBlackLady This is the most brilliant suggestion I’ve ever heard and I hope someone in the campaign’s communications department sees it.

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@yunuskocyigit1 @anumness When I was learning subtraction in 1st grade at 6 years old I asked my teacher what would happen if you reversed the problem and subtracted the larger integer from the smaller, she told me “you can’t do that” and I said “I’m pretty sure you can, it would just be negative”

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

If it’s any consolation to President Biden, I’m fairly certain that the 23rd century equivalent of Lin-Manuel Miranda is gonna write a Tony Award winning musical about his life? #BidenIsAGreatPresident #BidenSpeech

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@notcapnamerica Not at all the point but I remember when they introduced those semi-sheer ones that were sort of a deep tan tone that actually work with both my white winter color and brown summer color and it made my mixed heart so happy.

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@JoDivaRunner 🤣 I’d be willing to bet that even racist old white Americans don’t “like” Queen Side Chick. America is Diana Country, there’s no way.

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@LeciaMichelle11 I WILL FIGHT SOMEONE

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@LeciaMichelle11 Whoa. Genealogy is a wild trip.

[I Smoked Lindsey Graham @BlackKnight10k]

The reason Kevin Mccarthy is in this position in the first place is because he empowered the people who tried to have him killed 2 years ago.

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@notcapnamerica It’s not. Lindsey Graham is a moron.

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@michelle_byoung

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@QondiNtini He’s one of the *less* reprehensible GOP politicians from my state (which is admittedly not saying much. At all.) but I’m still LMAO at this.

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@QondiNtini I adore these two so much!

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@GlendaStrauch @SussexHenryVIII Tell me you don’t understand how social media algorithms work without telling me. 🙄

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@AuroraO83 @ask_aubry I was just thinking men my age (Elder Millennial) and up who only hit on young women in their early 20s are in for a RUDE awakening. GenZ (thankfully) wasn’t socialized to politely placate their BS. And good for you!

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@India_Renae_ It’s my second year in a row of ordering from Ivory Paper. Worth every penny!

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@myronjclifton Your parents actually liked each other and weren’t MERELY attempting to ensure dynastic continuity…?

Or they were overly cautious about childhood mortality rates for their historical and geographical context. One of the two. 🤣

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@LeslieStreeter @QondiNtini She’s literally out here spreading joy and thirst for the good.

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@Needle_of_Arya My (white, from ND) Jones Gen mom recalls watching news coverage of police turning fire hoses and dogs on Civil Rights protesters when she was ~7. She’s been liberal her whole life. Which isn’t to say she doesn’t have blind spots, but when she knows better she usually does better

[Elizabeth ⚖️🐝🌊🇺🇦 @ElizaTorres13]

@flutenstrings @ask_aubry Oh, I know. Bc I HAVE genuinely considered it. If it were only a matter of deciding “I like this religion’s philosophy the best” I’d have already done it, but I have ADHD and love pork so it’s been hard to find the motivation to sustain the necessary level of commitment. 🧡