The Kid

Here I write some of the ramblings that come out of The Kids 12 year old mouth.

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

Mum, what would you do if I was secretly Deadmau5?

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

My shoes are my children.

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

UKIP go suck yourself.

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

Would you rather shower in your own wee, or clap fifty times with poo in your hands?

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

I said I was 12 the other day because I forgot.

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

I've an itchy crease.

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

I'd hate to live in a public grave yard

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

I just got salt in my cut. I feel like a slug.

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

Clothes are a prison.

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

I want to go to Andover.

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

Never waste bacon

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

OMG did you know Arnie doesn't have a mental health problem? He's just Austrian!

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

Kiwis taste like nectarines but with a different taste.

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

It's summer, that means it's PIMMS

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

If you're blind, do you have no eyeballs?

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

Smell me, I smell like Jade Goody.

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

Why don't they have a waffle day?

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

You and your penis slang.

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

I'm not as tight as you, Mum.

[The Kid @EmTheKid]

I don't understand why perfume is so expensive. It's just like wee, but smells nicer.