Emily Mallis

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

So a fly flew into my mouth today… if that gives any indication of how my days going 🫠

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

When do they release the Black Friday sales for houses?

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

If you are someone who goes up to a person working retail and recites their spiel to them before they get to say it.. just know that I despise you.

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

Forgot the phrase “theme song” and the only way I could explain it was “sound logo” and I feel like it fits 😅

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

Was told I have a pleasant voice today sooo I’ll be riding that high all week 😅🤗

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

My life is the epitome of the “if I didn’t have bad luck I wouldn’t have any luck at all” saying.... 🙄😣

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

@Dunkaroos @ilovedunkaroos How do you get these?? I’ve been wishing for dunkaroos since they left! 😣

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

@pulte $emallis 🙏🏻

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

I’m getting irrationally mad at people coming into my work when I HAVE TO BE HERE.. like you don’t! STAY HOME!! #COVID19

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

Best news of 2020 thus far 😍😋

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

So my invisibility has reached a new level when I was sitting on the couch and someONE SAT ON ME because they didn’t see me there 🤦🏻‍♀️ I thought that only happened in movies... 🙄

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

@al_minnoe @emilyminnoe @rondom92 Not what I was referring to but that is a crowd pleaser 😭😂

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

@al_minnoe @emilyminnoe @rondom92 Don’t make me pull out my signature move.. The Freaky Deak 💃🏻😂

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

@emilyminnoe @rondom92 We got some smooth moves 💃🏻🕺🏻 😂

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

I like how at age 26 I still get carded for buying lotto tickets... 🙄😂 #babyface

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

When you’re in a public space and accident hit something that plays sound with your volume at full blast 🤦🏻‍♀️ let me just crawl in a hole now..

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

Wedding dress shopping today and my mom goes “it’s got that plunge you like, you little hoe” 😂 thanks mom...

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

Is it too early for Hallmark Christmas movies? 🤔 Nahhhhh 🤗🎄

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

Another spooky tale for today: The power goes out and you only have 3% battery on your phone 😱 #HappyHalloween

[Emily Mallis @EmilyMallis]

The scariest part of today is having to work 12 hours 😫 #HappyHalloween