Heiress

To define is to limit. TCU '17

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

Me: *losing my mind waiting to board the plane, heart racing, etc.*
My mom: "should I put vacation or fun on my status?" 🙃

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

The bag checker at the airport said our destination was the best he's seen today✌ #venice

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

Also the TSA guy was a fellow brown sugar cinnamon pop tart lover✌.. he said, "why do they make any other kind?"😂

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

My dad just called me willingly for the first time in over a month to have a 39 second conversation with me asking if I found the checkbook I was looking for 2 days ago.

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

Just saw a little kid pull down his pants and pee in the parking lot while the mom watched, so probably the best way to raise a kid.

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

PSA: No, we really dont want to call 70+ people today asking if you want a prescription filled or things like that and most that do answer yell at us to stop calling. But it's our job, there's literally a list we have to go through by the end of the day. Just dont answer.💁‍♀️

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

Me: *quietly eating brisket out of sight*
Store manager: "I smell food!... its brisket!"
Me: *Quickly devours brisket*

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

*chris staring at me looking deep in thought*
Me: "what are you doing?"
Him: "just thinking."
Me: "about what?"
Him: "just how stupid it is to foul on the 3 point line."
Me: "oh..."

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

*me and Chris sitting in Sam's eating hot dogs*
*lady rolls up to the man sitting at the table next to us in an electric scooter with a slice of pizza in the basket*
Chris: "is that meals on wheels?"

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

Chris: "you should make some meat loaf, that sounds good. What do you need meat and...??"
Me: "Loaf..."
Me: 😂😂😂
Chris: 😑

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

Chris (upon us arriving 3 minutes late to a place down the street): "You're the only person I know who can live 3 seconds from a place and still be late."

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

Just spent 15 minutes on the phone trying to explain the difference between a tablespoon and a teaspoon.

[Miley Cyrus @MileyCyrus]

Same Shit , New Year

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

Happy 2014 everyone

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

*Thank U, Next comes on the radio*
Chris: *very seriously* "Is she saying, 'bacon eggs?'"

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

*group of women my age talking about their kids*
Me: "my kids put twist ties in their water bowls. My kids are also cats, so..."

[bradlee @boujeesIut]

my brain while my mom is Iecturing me on something she’s already Iectured me 472848x times before

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

Me: *talking on the phone in quiet area*
*group of people walking sees me on the phone, stops right beside me, and begins loudly discussing the test they just took*
Me: :)??????

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

Just spent the last 5 minutes holding my cats up to the picture window upstairs so they could see the fireworks.

[Heiress @ErisAshton]

I love being recognized by people who work at places I go to frequently.