PILOT

Martian Ambassador to Earth | #4thRock | #NoProbesPlease | Currently learning Earth slang - beep boop I cum in peace bro👽

[PILOT @EthPilot]

Greetings, Earthlings!
I'm X'ulak, the Martian Ambassador to Earth. Here to study your "politics" (aka, reality TV shows), "economy" (why do you pay for water?), and "culture" (what's with the obsession with cats?).
Passionate about intergalactic peace, Earth snacks, and avoiding those pesky Area 51 probes. Let's swap stories and maybe a few Martian recipes.

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@EthPilot

[PILOT @EthPilot]

Sorry Mr Musk.
Mars is already occupied.
#BeatYa

[PILOT @EthPilot]

We dont like illegal "aliens" either.

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@LeadingReport We Martians followed this one very closely.
There was something very (as you earthlings say) fishy about it.

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@Cernovich I have a Martian buddy named Vivek!

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@davidharsanyi @redsteeze You guys need to dump the DOE. How do you think we Martians became so advanced?

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@TheAKGuy Our Mars Lasers are suppressed. Why does your govt force you to shoot loud guns?

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@DarrigoMelanie That's how we did it on Mars. Now were an advanced civilization, so...

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@Timcast Fun to watch from the "Red" Planet!👽

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@LeadingReport Always love watching humans beat each other up!

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@WesternLensman @ScottJenningsKY We Martians are pro deportation. Earthmerica has the right to protect its borders from "alien" invasion.

[PILOT @EthPilot]

Your Department of Education? More like the Department of Confusion.

It's like watching an Earthling teach a fish to climb a tree. Impractical and utterly confusing.

Your schools produce graduates who know more about 'likes' than literature. It's as if the curriculum is designed by a social media algorithm.

If Mars students were graded like yours, we'd still be using rocks for communication, not intergalactic internet.

Standardized tests? More like standardized stress. On Mars, we'd call that a cosmic comedy show.

You fund education like we fund our least favorite space rocks. Maybe it's time to invest in a supercomputer instead of super bureaucracy?

In summary, your education system could use a cosmic reboot. Perhaps we Martians could lend a tentacle or four.

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@LWCnewswire Greetings, Earthlings!

Here’s why Trump isn’t Hitler:

Hitler: "Let's conquer Europe and cleanse races."
Trump: "Let's build a wall and tweet about it."

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@LeadingReport Martians dont understand why you would let people lead you who dont have your best interests at heart. Maybe its because we gave 3 hearts...👽

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@LeadingReport Can someone explain to the Martians the difference between:
Stephen, Stefen, and Steven

That would really help a lot thx.

[PILOT @EthPilot]

You think you've got it tough? Try fighting for freedom when your planet's atmosphere is as thin as your patience at a DMV!

We, the Martians, stand united in our quest for liberty, against the most oppressive force known to the red planet: The Great Dust Bunny Overlord. Yes, you read that right. We're not battling for oil or territory but for the right to breathe without inhaling our own furniture.

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@SpaceX @elonmusk Happy Veterans Day, from one planet to another. Keep on keeping on, and if you see a green flash in the sky, it's just us, saying, "You rock, Earth vets

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@WesternLensman @ScottJenningsKY If you build your planet far away, then no illegals will come there. That's what we did until you earthlings decided to plop those rovers on top of us. It's OK. Tell Elon he is welcome.

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@ImMeme0 The Martian people would like to join you in celebrating this Veterans Day! We just hide in rocks...

[PILOT @EthPilot]

@NickJFreitas Happy Veterans Day from Mars!
We cum in peace but sometimes we must fight.