Extremely Grumpy

I enjoy being grumpy. No, really. It's an art form if done right. And, no, I don't care whether you like me. Surrender to your inner grump.

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

I'm actually not funny, I'm just really rude & people think I'm joking.

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

Don't worry David hayes, it happens to the best of us. I often have trouble finding the Klit.

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

I'd rather live a life of oh wells than a life of what ifs.

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

It's cute that you think everyone is jealous of you. We actually just don't like you.

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

My neighbors listen to good music, whether they like it or not…

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

If you're feeling lonely, if you're feeling blue, remember the mighty oak tree, was once a nut like you.

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

If you were a dinosaur, you would be Bitch-A-Whoreus.

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

*Future generation* Woman: I'll name my baby Sarah. Doctor: I'm sorry, but that name is already taken. You can try Sarah479 or Sarah771.

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

Oxymoron: Willful negligence

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

Me: Damn girl, you could be a model. Her: Really, you think so? Me: Ya, at the beginning of the evolution chart

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

It's been 15 years already & I'm still pissed off that I don't know what animal Arthur is… F**k is he a Bear!?!

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

If you eat fast food you should feel guilty. Because you ARE guilty of murder. #RIPfitbody

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

I quit my job working for Nike. I just couldn't do it.

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

Did you hear about the new Madonna stamp? It licks itself.

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

Can you be a closet claustrophobic?

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

Oxymoron: Cold as Hell

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

As I said before, I never repeat myself!

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

The trouble with some self-made men is that they worship their creator.

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

It is important to stay cool, but be sure to not get frostbite.

[Extremely Grumpy @ExtremelyGrumpy]

I'm ugly: You spelled Attention seeking whore wrong.