Deconstruction often begins as a creeping malaise towards Christian doctrine & ethics. For some, it’s the lack of ethics within the church which creates disequilibrium, for others it’s the ethics themselves.
It isn’t always easy to discern the cause (especially when we’re convinced the problem is external to us). Which is why blame is usually directed towards the church first. And, as long as our ecclesial unease remains ill-defined, we can comfortably dismiss the Church as retrogressive & irrelevant. This stage is normal, but should only be a stopover on our way to deeper self-reflection. Once we arrive & begin the process of defining our antipathy (which requires honest, humble, self-assessment), suddenly we discover a couple of things: One, we’re not alone; were never alone & those we assumed were cow-eyed lemmings are likewise processing the same troubling inconsistencies we see in the church. Two, we’re not immune to the criticism of inconsistency. Our pettiness, gossip, judgmentalism, hypocrisy, dishonesty & remaining immorality, likewise deserves our attention. Maybe more.
The truth is, deconstruction isn’t new. It’s not unique to this generation. Nor is it an irreparable condition. We’ve been doing this a few millennia now & in all of it God has heard every question, seen every tear & has helped our lungs expand & contract for every disappointed sigh.
We mustn’t forget He is the only lighting rod able to ground our disenchanted faith. He’s the only constant in a world of inconsistency. Yet He remains ever present; ever faithful, & fully attentive to our ache for something better in the Church & in ourselves.