Kip

I’m kinda like an uglier Lorde

[Kip @fakekip]

This is my best tweet

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Christmas brought to me by @charlybliss

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Whoops

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Clout chasing loser

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Gonna create a burner account to boost my engagement

[Kip @fakekip]

Gonna create a burner account to boost my engagement

[Kip @fakekip]

👀

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Streamers are able to tailor ads to exactly what we’re watching and our taste preferences so it’s only cowardice that we don’t have ads with full frontal nudity by now

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@hartattack99 @ChipotleTweets Which location?

[Kip @fakekip]

1) Carpenter

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Similarities between Sabrina Carpenter and Jesus Christ.

🧵

[Kip @fakekip]

Sending this to every woman you ever meet @smallthew @SonnyZach @FBI_man_watch_u and @DSmoteli

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Gonna have to start texting my wife pics of a bunch of hot women to prove I’m straight. Thanks @elonmusk

[Kip @fakekip]

Gonna have to start texting my wife pics of a bunch of hot women to prove I’m straight. Thanks @elonmusk

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@hartattack99 Don’t need to budget if I have a credit card. They gave me a credit limit so it’s likely they budget for me

[Kip @fakekip]

I want this tweet on my tombstone

[Vydamo @vydamo_]

It is with a heavy heart I announce the sale of my long term ape, Salazar. Most of my early followers know me as this ape. My kids know me as this ape. I met my wife when I WAS this ape and had my first kid when I was still proudly wore this ape. By extension, it is part of me.

I travelled around the world with this ape in my pocket. We went to the most luxurious hotels, the craziest night clubs and the most serene beaches. We had it all. Unfortunately, what blur is doing to apes is frankly unacceptable. Since the creation of Blur, the ape floor price has tumbled from 85e down to 12e.

Two weeks ago myself and around 15 other high ranking ape members gathered at the recent International Ape Workshop in Miami, and on behalf of the community we wrote and delivered a notarised letter begging Pacman to stop this nonsense at once.

We outlined three key terms the apes were demanding of Pacman:

1.) Effective immediately, blur should be shut down and all NFT collections affected should be refunded a part of their floor price at the time blur was created

2.) A written apology to @yugalabs and the community

3.) Sell all remilia assets held by ANY members of the blur team and publicly denounce @CharlotteFang77

As of today, March 28, 2024, Pacman has refused to acknowledge our letter. I have no choice but to sell my ape and retrieve some form of financial value before it trends to zero. Thankyou to everyone in the ape family who has been sending me messages over these last few days. I love you all.

I hope one day we meet on the other side, until then, goodbye.

[Kip @fakekip]

Excuse me, Grace, but I’m married

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@bensnider94 I’ll start the campaign to get yours shut down. Ward Parkway Lanes forever

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My favorite genres are scream and baking

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The puppy has joined the wrong side of the War on Christmas

[Kip @fakekip]

@hartattack99 Coward

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Feeling a little tired and depressed? Panera lemonade will solve it, one way or another.

[Kip @fakekip]

Top 0.1% of @carlyraejepsen fans