Fake Mike Johnston

Winterhawks win, the rest... you won't. Punking the WHL Nov. 28, 2008-June 25, 2014 & May 11, 2016-eternity. VP/GM/HC/Savior/Visionary. I'm real. #IHaveReturned

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

Winterhawks win, the rest... you won't. Punking the WHL from 11/28/08-6/25/14 & 5/11/16-eternity. VP/GM/HC/Savior/Visionary. #IHaveReturned

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

@kevin19stocker “The Unsullied Inning”

[Sonny @SonnyDoney97]

It’s ok refs, throwing out Mike Johnston tonight only makes sure he gets to his post game routine of watching the game film & drink his victory sherry. Cheers @FakeMikeJ #KissTheRing

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

Silver lining to implosion of Coronavirus/oil price collapse/Bill Gallacher’s mistresses calling in loans… I have gotten to can so! many! people! Of course I say “…it’s just a furlough.” Who needs them? Give me an ice plant, zamboni & 25 wage-free players. Then #kissthering

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

Honestly… I knew we were fucked when I saw the Trump University text/colouring books in Gallacher’s private jet in 2014. If I had to do it all over again… probably should’ve taken that offer from Pens for Nova Scotia scouting gig instead after HC. #kissthering

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

Told Gallacher 5 years ago I moved bulk of my portfolio into solar/wind and smartpuck tracking sectors. He seemed quite baffled at the prospect. #betterthanyou #kissthering

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

@Smitty0478 #kissthering

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

RIP #PaulAllen. His transcendental talent for being at the right place/right time while providing minimal work and yet accumulating extraordinary personal wealth is a heartening narrative for the modern gilded age. His jumbled approach to philanthropy a true pièce de résistance.

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

@MastImages @pdxwinterhawks This is better. Work on your framing. Thanks. #kissthering

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

Regardless your opinions and desires, I will eventually can each and every person from the Winterhawks that you know of. Also, those you don’t know too. (I recommend Piper & Gussy sleep with one eye open.) #IHaveReturned https://t.co/GBnbX38rGc

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

Intriguing. Not five days ago… on Taking Note: “Mike Williamson belongs on list of top WHL coaches.” I’ll allow you to decide for yourself if this is somehow related. Really. #kissthering https://t.co/il0m7Q9aq0

[Gregg Drinnan @gdrinnan]

Site now appears to be unsafe. No idea what is happening. May bury it.

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

A 10 game win streak is nice. But not nearly as nice as watching game film with a small sherry as we run up the score. #kissthering

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

Fair point. Also, there’s 21 WHL teams that could give back some clues on how to produce a viable hockey organization … yet Toigo will still screw it up. https://t.co/wul0rLW9k1

[Chad Balcom @hawkeyblog]

There’s 21 @TheWHL buildings that could take come clues from the @LangleyEvents on how to produce a video feed: they do an excellent job #WHL @NeuLionInc

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

ICYMI… Mike Williamson has some pretty serious kompromat on Drinnan to end up with this: https://t.co/Hg4FkCmkUl

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

I’ll just come out and say what you’re thinking: Drinnan is straight up trolling me with this. The “No Media” policy in Kamloops since 2008 (sorry Keen) continues into perpetuity. #KissTheRing https://t.co/wG9xbJJbz1

[Gregg Drinnan @gdrinnan]

Williamson belongs on list of WHL's top coaches ... Wheat Kings sign first-round pick, drop defenceman ... https://t.co/hJAzPFXkTn

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

Obviously someone from the Williamson family clicked Drinnan’s “Donate” button. #KissTheRing https://t.co/wG9xbJJbz1

[Gregg Drinnan @gdrinnan]

Williamson belongs on list of WHL's top coaches ... Wheat Kings sign first-round pick, drop defenceman ... https://t.co/hJAzPFXkTn

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

Here’ one way to honor WHL players https://t.co/bR4cShIDpJ

And another way to “honor” WHL players https://t.co/5LcMcCJWnS

Really.

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

As is tradition…Winterhawks fans: Spin yourselves in a tizzy this early season. I’ll be sipping sherry for the first 20 games #IHaveReturned

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

Regardless Twitter’s future I’ll continue missives at 140 characters. I’m already better than all of you at that length anyway. #KissTheRing

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

@gochiefsgoblog Your future looks bright though after Yammi advances on from Spokane. Wait. What. Not really. #IHaveReturned

[Fake Mike Johnston @FakeMikeJ]

Vrooman gone. Winterhawks fans: Try not to get attached since I will eventually can everyone. Piper: Wear a tie or you next. #IHaveReturned