NBL Fake Schefty

This account is made in jest and for the purpose of satire for the NoBitchassne$$ fantasy league. Everything you read here is fake just like your title chances.

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

After Collin's Thursday night showing, you had to think that #Krooked was doomed for failure, but not even a TD could save Royce Freeman as he puts up a paltry 8.8 after only snagging 8 carries for 28 yards. At least it's not Peyton Barber? 🤷🏻‍♂️

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

Looks like we've got a league bet placing Alex Collins against "Rolls" Royce Freeman tonight. One thing is for sure, whoever loses this bet isn't just losing $10. They're losing all credibility as a fantasy owner. Probably a pussy, too.

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

BLOCKBUSTER trade today between #KrookedKurtz and #Seanshank. And by blockbuster I mean these teams are going to be as irrelevant as Blockbuster video in 5 weeks. #BeKind #PleaseRewind

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

Goodness gracious, Joe Mixon headed for arthroscopic knee surgery after last night's game. Looks like Team Hanna's season is headed for the gurley gates. It's over folks, dat boi dead. At least that's what sources are telling me.

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

Looks like we've got a league bet placing Alex Collins against "Rolls" Royce Freeman tonight. One thing is for sure, whoever loses this bet isn't just losing $10. They're losing all credibility as a fantasy owner. Probably a pussy, too.

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

#GodDontMakeNoJunk

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

Some drama in the NBL today. No league note yet from the commissioner. League owners are growing restless as the week starts today and the commish has remained silent. Power play by the Mish? Is his gif repository running low? Time will tell.

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

@SeanAmir Nothing good. Even worse, folks are saying Joe Mixon looks like a young Leveon Bell, which means it should be any day now that Mixon is suspended for some stupid bullshit.

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

My sources are telling me that the #Raiders are re-signing WR Martavis Bryant to a one year deal. You know what they say — a penny saved is a penny earned. And every penny you spend on Martavis will absolutely be spent on rapper weed. #GANGGANG

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

Hey it's me bitches, I'm back and I've got some news hot off the presses. Big first day of waivers for the good folks of NBL. Team Big Richard Energy had big richard plans, but sources say his alarm didn't go off and he slept through the opening of waivers.

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

Yoooo @Chilis I love you guys for real, but if you don't sponsor @theanwarnewton's shows @LTWSE and/or @this_week_sucks, I'm afraid I'll have to give up lil chicken crispers forever. Please don't make this my reality.

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

@LosPollosTV I'm 1/2 Ginobili, 5/2 Tractor Traylor #RIP

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

@PeteBrush What time would you say this is all going down, Pete?

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

@adamcbest I don't even like @barstoolsports but boy oh boy you look SUPER stupid right now. Haha you must feel like shit.

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

@LosPollosTV Hey I just wanted to hit you up because I think a huge idiot has taken over your account, you should change ur password bro

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

@Grangerous @RJMilbourne @Yg_Trece @gordonhayward It's a business dude. It's his LIFE, for you it's just a game. Get real. Feel badly your kids have your dumb ass to look up to.

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

Getting word that #SeanshankRedemption is hungry — would've liked to have dinner bought for him before he got fucked so hard in #Zeke trade.

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

#FREEZEKE MOTHA FUCKA

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

BIG IF TRUE https://t.co/U8q4Y4UGEx

[Ian Rapoport @RapSheet]

Zeke Elliott’s legal team and the NFL were informed today there will a ruling from the NY Southern District court by end of day today.

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

Spoke with #Lib1 earlier, he says he'll probably quit if he loses this game tonight. I mean, yeah. If you lose to Jacoby on #MNF. Be gone!

[NBL Fake Schefty @FakeScheftyNoBa]

Brissett on Sean's chances to win tonight: "He needs how many points? Oh, hell nah. No, I'm not gonna score that much haha. Good one."