FakeThomasJefferson

I'm on the two dollar bill, top that G Dub! And I mean the real G Dub, George W. Bush... Parody, since I'm really not alive anymore. Yea Democracy and the God!

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

So, I heard from a telegram that #ElChapo was caught again.He reminds me of King George's excrement. #terrorist #Trumpsfencewontstophisdrugs

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

Things I hate (revised):

1. #Tyranny
2. @realDonaldTrump
3. #handguns aka small, rapid firing, muskets
4. @fauxjmad
5. #beets

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

@MormonDems @bowers492 Why'd FDR even say this? Who would purposely defund/destroy our educational system? #EVERYGOPSTATE #un'murican

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

@NRA I could be wrong (lol) but doesn't my 2nd Am say for the purpose of militia? Stop screwing up what I said! @TheTweetOfGod @MikeLoBurgio

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

I need to tweet more... Shit's gettin real in my grand Ol' U S of A! #KingGeorgeLovesTrump #concealandcarrymuskets

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

@ksucats96 @BryanLowry3 @alexdstuckey @stltoday Democracy as I meant it: For the elite behind closed doors... Oh wait... #OGFoundingFather

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

@ConcealNCarryNt Curse you @fauxjmad! You and your damn federalist ideas! Like having a federal government works. #ArticlesOfConfederation

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

@ConcealNCarryNt Listen buddy, I wrote the fuckin Constitution, so stop misrepresenting me! #douchecanoe

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

@ConcealNCarryNt I don't remember when we used conceal n carry in 1789... WE HAD 5 FOOT LONG MUSKETS! #ChapelHillShooting #BanConcealNCarry

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

Kansas doing what Kansas does best: butchering my Constitution... and yours. #LGBT #GayRights http://t.co/dOo9DvcaQV @NotSamBrownback

[Fake Sam Brownback @NotSamBrownback]

If you voted for me I assumed you didn't read the news. If you still support me now I can only assume you can't read.

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

@NotAndyJax What have you been up to? Destroying any cultures lately? #douchecanoe #trailoftears #AndrewJacksonSucks

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

My two nemesis... CURSE THE BOTH OF YOU @NotAndyJax and@fauxjmad!!! #slavesnomore #SlashYourCarriageWheels #OGFramer

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

Things I hate (revised):

1. #Tyranny
2. #Knicks
3. #coldweather
4. #hangovers
5. #AndrewJackson
...
4276. Peas

@fauxjmad

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

So the #Knicks are really sucking. THIS IS FREAKIN AWESOME!!! No sport team should be named after my pants. #knickerbockers #76ers4life

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

So I'm visiting Texas... This place really loves itself! #vanity #RepublicOfTexas #StarsShineBright #steers

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

Hey @fauxjmad, I'm referencing the Louisiana Purchase. I know your wife usually helps you think, so you're welcome. #federalisted #OGFramer

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

I'm back ladies! I had to chase my girl #SallyHemings down on the beach on this new land I just bought... Got that shit cheap! #GatorsSuck

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

#America's awesome! Glad I thought of it. #OGPatriot #OGFramer #OGTeaParty #GameDay

[FakeThomasJefferson @FakeTommyJeff]

@DanaHoule We're the best America has to offer! James Madison is a douche, btw. @fauxjmad